True Blood
Let's Boot & Rally

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 2 USERS: A-
YOU GRADE IT
The Invention Of Roses
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

PREVIOUSLY

Alcide's man Doug was glamoured during Russell's release, to what end we don't know but can guess, and more moles were discovered in the highest ranks of the Authority. Sam reconnected with his Shifter friends for a second, but then they got shot in their heads; Patrick and Terry found Ellers in some kind of anti-monster hideout. A fellow faerie told Jason that his parents were killed by vampires, and Pam taught Tara about eating people. And as the Boys watched from outside, regrettably, Sookie finally put the moves on Alcide.

LOL OUTSIDE

Eric: "This is boring. Watching that girl climb a werewolf is boring now that I don't have amnesia."
Bill: "Would that Ah could catch a fleeting case of that affliction."
Eric: "Seriously, aren't we supposed to be looking for Russell?"
Bill: "Perhaps we should consider using his prey as our own bait, since he's bound to come looking for her anon."
Eric: "You mean, Let's pretend to be selfish about it, but really the plan is just to stick as close to her as possible, like always?"
Bill: "Ah just want you to think Ah am cool, Sherriff Northman. It is an uphill battle."

Alcide: "Sookie, I weigh about fourteen of you and we've had the same amount to drink. Now, I've seen Veronica Mars, so I know what date rape is..."
Sookie: "Hush, puppy."

Alcide gets naked enough that it's not a total waste, but then Sookie barfs all over him... Just in time for the Boys to show up in the doorframe, kind of amazed at the knowledge that Shrieking Fangbanger was apparently the best possible version of Sookie Stackhouse.

LAFAYETTE

Is still flipping out over his Demon Face issues, and ends up wrecking shop on Jesus's Santeria shrine in a particularly destructive way -- mostly because all the icons are still Wonderfallsing all over him. In a bizarre about-face, this happens:

Lafayette: "Are you there, God? It's me, Lafayette. And hooker, I am tired of this shit."
God: "Oh, life is suffering, bitch."
Lafayette: "Compared to other people on this show, I have only done things that were culturally negative, not ethically so! Drug-dealing, but that's it!"

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True Blood

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