True Blood
Let's Boot & Rally

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 3 USERS: A-
YOU GRADE IT
The Invention Of Roses

"Remember that one time, you might not remember because things like this happen so much, but remember that one time they made the whole town believe that Sam was God, and then he pulled a lady's heart out of her chest?"

Never mind, I thought this was the second of the three coming-out scenes, but it's just Andy letting us know that he still remembers shapeshifters and how they do. Still, he's just like, "That sucks that your friends you like to turn into horses with got shot at point-blank range at the same time. It is also a little suspicious."

FANGTASIA!

Aww, it's still so good. So you've got Jessica -- who, by the way, looks like she's about to put a hex on the popular kids, total Craft 1996 vibe -- who is the... Vampire daughter of the ex-boyfriend of Tara's ex-best friend and quasi-sister, making her Tara's step-niece but also older sister, because of vampire times. And then too, though, Jessica was the most sheltered person that ever lived, like, her father protected her to the extent that it was abusive, while Tara was -- have you heard? -- the most abused person that has ever lived. Protected by nobody, ever. And it drove both of them crazy, in more or less socially sanctioned ways.

And then Jessica became a vampire (FYI, this week's babyvamp-jess is required reading) and everything flipped over: She and Bill have one of the best relationships on the show, she's a thousand times closer to integrating her shit than anybody else, and she seems to be the only person who can ever play with fire without getting burned by it. Like, even Eric couldn't manage that, when it came down to it; not even Godric's ghost could help there.

And on the other hand you've got Tara, who is so familiar with being out of control that every season has been another way for her to force control on herself: First by killing the possum and the black-eyed girl, then running to the Mommy Maryann that act invoked, then falling into the vampire-boyfriend trap with Franklin, then by becoming Toni -- a completely separate, way less fucked-up person. And nothing helped, not even Antonia, and eventually she died. I maintain that this show gives you a lot of options for fucking yourself over, and very few for getting clean again, but what I can't do is think of a single undead person on this show for whom death wasn't a good thing.

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True Blood

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