True Blood
Let's Boot & Rally

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 2 USERS: A-
The Invention Of Roses

Whining Authoritarians: "They dawdled about Bon Temps! Visited the home of a local waitress! Went to the Kwik-E-Mart for a jumbo coffee and box of Nutter Butters! Traveled by van to a parking facility in Shreveport!"

...Which, how is that not exactly what they should be doing? There'd be no point in concealing, at this point, the location of Mississippi's former incarceration, so why is this a sticking point? Must be the Nutter Butters. Which also, how did they know that. Credit cards, I guess. Vampire ones. I wish there was a vampire The Wire, first of all because it would be so much easier if your bad guys were only awake half the day to do their crimes, but mostly because I wish everything was vampires all the time and all TV shows had vampires. Mark my words, this is a trend that is about to take off.*

Authority: "Please notify Mr. Compton and Mr. Northman that the Guardian has instructed that they have until dawn to find Russell Edgington or they will be terminated."
Molly: "Check. Am I still adorable? Also check."

*(Speaking of, though, have you been picking up this mermaid vibe lately? All week long, everywhere I go, random mermaids. How long has this been going on? Start your YA pitches now, because mermaids are about to hit or I'm behind the curve and are already hitting.)

Roman: "Chancellor Drew was a great man... I thought he was a great man, we drafted the VRA together. He was deeply committed to mainstreaming. How could he lose his way? How could I not see it?"

Roman and Salome dig on that crystal philter with the Lilith Blood in it, and then it turns out that's not even really Lilith's blood, just some whatever blood.

Roman: "It's like transubstantiation..."
Salome: "Yeah, like how many bajillion people have died over the centuries because of a stupid fight about whether or not magic cardboard bread is really magic or just mostly magic. People who concretize faith that way really get my goat. Like, why does it matter that evolution is real? It clearly is a fact of the universe, it's not hurting anybody and it wouldn't even if it weren't true."
Roman: "And why are atheists so stupid about it too? It's like watching a fight between two second-graders about how old you have to be for a driver's license. When you don't know anything about a subject, everything's up for debate."

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True Blood




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