True Blood

Ep.

Title

Air/Pub'l

Grade

Author

5-12
Recap

My Early Life

Save Yourself - Lilith and Luna manage to bring the Apocalypse on a little ahead of schedule.

2012.08.26
2012.08.29
A+

Jacob Clifton

5-11
Recap

Lilith Flair

Song Of The Dead Faerie - As the Authority implodes, the Stackhouses manage to doom the entire Fairy Nation and the rest of the cast heads back to the Compound.

2012.08.19
2012.08.27
A+

Jacob Clifton

5-10
Recap

Love Isn't A Good Sailor

Gone, Gone, Gone - Hoyt gets some peace, Jessica finds a new home, and Tara gets awesome.

2012.08.12
2012.08.19
A+

Jacob Clifton

5-9
Recap

Uncle Ruckus Gets A Puppy

Everybody Wants To Rule The World - Bill finds a new way to be a plot contrivance; Alcide acts all sad; Sookie gets into pig trouble.

2012.08.05
2012.08.07
A+

Jacob Clifton

5-8
Recap

Lilith Wants Me To Eat A Baby

Somebody That I Used To Know - Everybody does major plot-twisty things, each of which is completed in seconds. But since there are thousands of storylines, this still takes an hour.

2012.07.29
2012.08.03
C

Jacob Clifton

5-7
Recap

Picture Me & Then Start Watching

In The Beginning - Bill and Hoyt join some cults; Tara and Pam continue to win.

2012.07.22
2012.07.27
A+

Jacob Clifton

5-6
Recap

I Woke Up & One Of Us Was Crying

Hopeless - The Stackhouses get to the bottom of their parents' murder; the entire Authority flips over.

2012.07.15
2012.07.17
A+

Jacob Clifton

5-5
Recap

The Invention Of Roses

Let's Boot & Rally - Sookie puts aside a desperately needed nap to track down King Russell, while Tara makes a friend.

2012.07.08
2012.07.13
A+

Jacob Clifton

5-4
Recap

They Stuck Me Together With Glue

We'll Meet Again - Bill, Eric and Pam have daughter problems; Sookie gets naked wasted.

2012.07.01
2012.07.08
A+

Jacob Clifton

5-3
Recap

That Darn Salome!

Whatever I Am, You Made Me - The Boys get a leather-harnessed reprieve, and another vampire learns about the existence of faeries.

2012.06.24
2012.06.27
A+

Jacob Clifton

5-2
Recap

The New Shape Of Myself

Authority Always Wins - The Authority is finally revealed, and they are hilarious.

2012.06.17
2012.06.22
A+

Jacob Clifton

5-1
Recap

I Love You Jason Stackhouse

Turn! Turn! Turn! - [Spoiler]'s not the only thing that came back messed up.

2012.06.10
2012.06.15
C

Jacob Clifton

4-12
Recap

Trust Me On The Sunscreen

And When I Die - Halloween proves both complex and unpronounceable for the denizens of Bon Temps, everybody does part-time witchcraft and everybody kills at least one other person.

2011.09.11
2011.09.14
A+

Jacob Clifton

4-11
Recap

Dead Queenie Dead

Soul Of Fire - The MoonGoddess standoff ends, but the Witch War's not quite over.

2011.09.04
2011.09.10
A+

Jacob Clifton

4-10
Recap

Them Vs. Them

Burning Down The House - Marnie fortifies and the vampires besiege; Jason insults Jessica lots of ways; a sad small death.

2011.08.28
2011.09.05
A+

Jacob Clifton

4-9
Recap

Body Dysmorphia & The Lapin Agile

Run - Everybody shuffles around to get into position for whatever happens in the end of the season, and it's somehow simultaneously boring and obnoxious.

2011.08.21
2011.08.26
D

Jacob Clifton

4-8
Recap

A Rookie In Sex Narnia

Spellbound - Eric and Sookie take a trip, while the latest hope for peace goes the way of Godric and the Witch War begins.

2011.08.14
2011.08.19
A+

Jacob Clifton

4-7
Recap

The Faces That You Meet

Cold Gray Light Of Dawn - Antonia's Army finally goes after every vampire in town; Debbie's marbles begin disappearing; Sookie gets her some.

2011.08.07
2011.08.14
A+

Jacob Clifton

4-6
Recap

The Mask & Mirror

I Wish I Was The Moon - Jason hangs out in the woods while Sam's life falls swiftly to pieces; Pam meets her rival for Tara's affections; Antonia locates an old war buddy.

2011.07.31
2011.08.01
A+

Jacob Clifton

4-5
Recap

Asymmetry In Wartime

I Hate You, I Love You - Jason makes it back to town, Team Lala abruptly leaves, we finally learn the deal with Ghost Witch Lady, and there's kissin'. Such kissin'.

2011.07.24
2011.07.28
A+

Jacob Clifton

4-4
Recap

Panther No Panth, I'm Going Thwimming

I'm Alive & On Fire - Marnie and Pam face off, Bill and Portia break it off, Alcide and Eric have a pants-off dance off which will live in infamy forever.

2011.07.17
2011.07.24
A+

Jacob Clifton

4-3
Recap

A Visit From The Poon Squad

If You Love Me, Why Am I Dyin'? - Hotshot takes their relationship with Jason to the next level, while Eric gets a hot new babysitter.

2011.07.10
2011.07.17
A+

Jacob Clifton

4-2
Recap

The Lying, The Witch & The Wardrobe

You Smell Like Dinner - Everybody keeps smelling Sookie; somebody gets amnesia.

2011.07.03
2011.07.07
A+

Jacob Clifton

4-1
Recap

The Dessert Of The Real, Or: Shut The Elf Up!

She's Not There - Sookie comes back from Faeryland to a whole new scene; somebody is a surprise lesbian.

2011.06.26
2011.07.01
A+

Jacob Clifton

3-12
Recap

Be Quiet & Drive

Evil Is Going On - Everybody tells everybody else their secrets and then they all go zooming off into a million different directions like our expanding universe.

2010.09.12
2010.09.17
A

Jacob Clifton

3-11
Recap

Anger Is An Energy

Fresh Blood - Penultimate showdown between vampires and the sun! Fathers and sons! Mothers and daughters! Dog-people! Cat-people! All the people! Doing it!

2010.08.29
2010.09.07
A+

Jacob Clifton

3-10
Recap

Pictures Of The Floating World

I Smell A Rat - Everybody tells the truth about everything and so of course it just gets worse for everybody.

2010.08.22
2010.08.26
A+

Jacob Clifton

3-9
Recap

Mr. Edgington Goes To Washington

Everything Is Broken - Many problems are solved, many questions are asked, Sam finally goes nuts, and King Russell ruins just everything. In the most wonderful way.

2010.08.15
2010.08.20
A+

Jacob Clifton

3-8
Recap

Without Stadium Love

Night On The Sun - Absolutely everybody on the show finally makes it back to Bon Temps, but for one night only. On the other hand? Very busy night.

2010.08.08
2010.08.12
A+

Jacob Clifton

3-7
Recap

In Rhythm & Sorrow

Hitting The Ground - A bunch of awesome people die; a bunch of awesomer people don't.

2010.08.01
2010.08.06
A+

Jacob Clifton

3-6
Recap

Dazzler & Le Bad Boy

I Gotta Right to Sing the Blues - Russell and Eric tour Louisiana, Tara and Sookie make a run for it and Sam finally figures out his awful family's secrets.

2010.07.25
2010.07.28
B-

Jacob Clifton

3-5
Recap

Vendetta For V

Trouble - In the so-far best episode of the season, everybody's either kidnapped in Jackson or working at Merlotte's, so the one million characters start being easier to handle. Except for the Mickenses, who continue to redefine grossness.

2010.07.18
2010.07.25
A+

Jacob Clifton

3-4
Recap

Another Stackhouse Filibuster

9 Crimes - We trade Sookie's engagement for Tara's and Debbie's, and Bill continues to go crazy. Also: Many abs.

2010.07.11
2010.07.16
A+

Jacob Clifton

3-3
Recap

Define "Screw"

It Hurts Me Too - Weird sex, surprise alliances and betrayals, and the lamest biker bar of all time.

2010.06.27
2010.06.28
C

Jacob Clifton

3-2
Recap

Consequences Of Falling

Beautifully Broken - Bill gets a surprise in Mississippi, Sam gets three surprises in Arkansas, Lafayette meets his mother's keeper, and Tara makes a creepy new friend.

2010.06.20
2010.06.25
A+

Jacob Clifton

3-1
Recap

Love Is The Plan The Plan Is Death (1973)

Bad Blood - Sookie harasses the world at large to find Bill, while he's finding all kinds of new men to fight with and Tara comes face to face with some unfortunate truths. Also, werewolves.

2010.06.13
2010.06.20
A+

Jacob Clifton

2-12
Recap

Rough Music

Beyond Here Lies Nothin' - Two near-weddings and a substantially larger amount of funerals.

2009.09.13
2009.09.22
A+

Jacob Clifton

2-11
Recap

Never Jam Today

Frenzy - Bill gets jerked around by the Queen, while Tara messes with everybody else's heads back home.

2009.08.30
2009.09.03
A+

Jacob Clifton

2-10
Recap

The Five And A Half Minute Hallway

New World In My View New World In My View - Team Dallas finally returns to Bon Temps, which has gone from its usual crappiness to a whole new demonic kind of crappiness while they were gone.

2009.08.23
2009.08.28
A+

Jacob Clifton

2-9
Recap

The Secret History

I Will Rise Up I Will Rise Up - Maryann's angry, Tara is lost, Eric is very naked, and Godric solves the Dallas problem or something.

2009.08.14
2009.08.22
A+

Jacob Clifton

2-8
Recap

Someone Else's Apocalypse

Timebomb Timebomb - The crisis at the church is momentarily defused; Godric comes home; Tara and Jason both cross state lines. Oh, and Sookie goes totally Springer.

2009.08.09
2009.08.14
A+

Jacob Clifton

2-7
Recap

Baby's Got The Bleeds

Release Me Release Me - Sookie finds Godric not a second too soon, Daphne is the exposition robot of all time, and Bill has yet another in a succession of bad days.

2009.08.02
2009.08.07
A+

Jacob Clifton

2-6
Recap

Mars & The Real Girl

Hard-Hearted Hannah Hard-Hearted Hannah - The whole town of Bon Temps gathers 'round the fire, while Hoyt makes a break for it and Sookie once again engineers her own kidnapping.

2009.07.26
2009.07.31
A+

Jacob Clifton

2-5
Recap

Who's Afraid Of Naomi Wolf?

Never Let Me Go - Dallas gets more interesting, Bon Temps gets more insane, and one of the Newlins finally makes his/her move on poor dumb Jason Stackhouse.

2009.07.19
2009.07.24
A+

Jacob Clifton

2-4
Recap

Huxley Smashcake's Ruinous Revenge

Shake & Fingerpop Shake & Fingerpop - While two cults and two armies gather in both numbers and per capita crazy, everybody makes new friends: Sookie, Sam, Lafayette, Tara and Sam, Jessica, Jason. Even Bill makes a new friend in Limo Driver Leon!

2009.07.12
2009.07.17
A+

Jacob Clifton

2-3
Recap

Sex & Candy

Scratches Scratches - Tara and Jason finally notice the total creepiness of their respective cults, Bill and Sookie break up 100times, and the awesomest love story of all time.

2009.06.28
2009.07.06
A+

Jacob Clifton

2-2
Recap

Written On The Body

Keep This Party Going Keep This Party Going - Jessica's family gets a surprise visit, Lafayette makes a stunning offer, Jason makes friends and enemies in his cult, and Maryann starts her own.

2009.06.21
2009.06.29
A+

Jacob Clifton

2-1
Recap

A Sudden Fear In Lonely Places

Nothing But The Blood Nothing But The Blood - Bill's new responsibility, Jason's new mission, Lafayette's final fate, and some things you shouldn't watch with family members.

2009.06.14
2009.06.22
A+

Jacob Clifton

1-12
Recap

All Signs Are Vital

You'll Be The Death Of Me - The Fangbanger Strangler is brought to justice, Jason joins a new congregation, Tara makes some scary new friends, and a bunch of people die. Some of them even stay that way.

2008.11.23
2008.12.02
A+

Jacob Clifton

1-11
Recap

Werewolf Vs. Vampire Vs. Somebody We Forgot To Be

To Love Is To Bury - Tara leaves jail in the arms of a brand new kind of crazy, Sam and Sookie get a little closer, Bill is exhausted by parenthood, and even Jason thinks he's the Killer.

2008.11.16
2008.11.22
A+

Jacob Clifton

1-10
Recap

The Pig It Was That Lived

I Don't Wanna Know - Everybody goes insane simultaneously, and only your friendly neighborhood were-collie is available to help pick up the pieces. Suffice to say the pieces mostly remain unpicked-up. And in other news, Bill gives birth.

2008.11.09
2008.11.14
A+

Jacob Clifton

1-9
Recap

Dure Toute La Vie

Plaisir D'Amour - Those lovable drug addicts Jason and Amy declare their love for each other over the screams of their captive; Bill pays the price for saving Sookie from Long Shadow; Sam pays the price of Tara's exorcism and finally comes out of the Canine Closet.

2008.11.02
2008.11.07
A+

Jacob Clifton

1-8
Recap

Resting Places

The Fourth Man In The Fire - Eric summons Sookie for help with an embezzling vampire, while Tara goes into a total meltdown and Amy reveals the not-so-adorable side of drug addiction.

2008.10.26
2008.10.31
A+

Jacob Clifton

1-7
Recap

Show Me How You Do That Trick

Burning House Of Love - Tara and Jason meet some witches, Bill is probably suckin' sunshine somewhere, and Sookie investigates what life is like for skanks.

2008.10.19
2008.10.25
A+

Jacob Clifton

1-6
Recap

Reverse Cowgirl

Cold Ground - That funeral-as-aphrodisiac thing gets everybody's blood pumping. One way or another.

2008.10.12
2008.10.17
A+

Jacob Clifton

1-5
Recap

Driver's Ed

Sparks Fly Out - Bill meets Bon Temps; Jason gives V -- and Lafayette -- another chance, with wild consequences; Tara's heart is broken once again; Sam shows us a little bit of the beast; there's a death in the family.

2008.10.05
2008.10.12
A+

Jacob Clifton

1-4
Recap

Sex On Fire

Escape From Dragon House - Jason brings new meaning to the term southern rock and we finally get background on Tara's devotion to him; things heat up for Bill and Sookie after a danger- (and Muppet-) tinged visit to Eric's vampire sex club.

2008.09.28
2008.10.04
A+

Jacob Clifton

1-3
Recap

The Stackhouse Filibuster

Mine - Sookie realizes the downside to dating dead guys, as does Naked Jason; Tara makes a new friend; Dawn meets an ugly fate.

2008.09.21
2008.09.26
A+

Jacob Clifton

1-2
Recap

What Distant Deeps Or Skies

The First Taste - Sookie tries to get her head around what happens when your boyfriend's buddies are undead jerks, some other jerks we hate get themselves permanently dead, Jason employs a unique and very naked strategy to get himself under control, and Tara rules the world.

2008.09.14
2008.09.22
A+

Jacob Clifton

1-1
Recap

Say Hello To The Rest Of Us

Strange Love - Vampires, they exist. Psychic waitresses, they are adorable. Sassy black sidekicks, they may or may not have anything else happening. Naked Jason Stackhouse?

2008.09.07
2008.09.15
A+

Jacob Clifton

Comments

SHARE THE SNARK

X

Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

True Blood Blog Posts

The Latest Activity On TwOP