God, this scene is embarrassing. So he painfully goes to the next expository point -- "But that don't work on us? Because we're shifters?" -- and she sets up what is sure to be an important point once Bill and his Sheriff come home, my emphasis: "All supernaturals, we got a natural resistance. She can force our shifts, and other stuff with other supes, but she can't get inside us. We gotta go to her on our own free will. And she just loves a challenge!"

Which is fine for plot and fine to know a bit more about the show's mythology, but it's just so limited and Daphne-esque that I can't imagine what she's not saying. "I'm not a challenge, I'm a person!" he shouts, just like not-technically-a-girl Jessica in bed with Hoyt, and Daphne laughs affectionately, jumping back in the water ("I'm sweating like a pig!"), but Sam doesn't feel like swimming. "What the fuck is she?" he asks, when her head breaks water, and she says the truest thing so far: "She's God, dumdum!"

Hugo wigs out begging to go to the bathroom, and finally Sookie tries to shut him up with a plastic water bottle, but he's not having it, so she tries to calm him down again, and immediately opens up a bunch of memories: How he joined the Fellowship and Steve Newlin blessed him on his knees, how he offered to join the mission, how he called ahead to let them know. Sookie jumps back and gets way antsy.

"Maryann is not God," Sam sputters, and Daphne's like, "As close to God as we'll ever get." She names her -- Kali, Lilith, Isis, even Amy's Gaia -- but says ultimately she's a maenad, which the Greeks called handmaidens of Dionysus, but were actually a much bigger better deal than that. Sam crouches, head hurting: "Dionysus, the God of wine?" She smiles, because he owns a bar, so of course he would know that part. But there was another name for him: The Horned God. Sam gets super scared, because he's naïve and a superstitious idiot, and thinks Satan is a useful or worthwhile concept.