"THAT IS WHAT WORRIES ME!" Eric screams, unbelievably sincerely. Well, murmurs seductively in a somewhat urgent fashion, which amounts to the same thing for him. "If One Such As He can be taken by humans, then none of us is safe!" Um, then get me the fuck out of here, and Sookie as well. "What can I give you to release Sookie from her agreement?" Nada. But, Eric says, "Since you like humans so much, I think you would want to protect them. The vampires here, they're like cowboys. If they don't get Godric back, they'll want justice. They'll start attacking people." You want to play Mass Slaughter, go ahead and do it. Vampire vs. Human. Texas is a chessboard. "That's insane!" Bill yells, and Eric leans back. "Well. It's Texas."

Hell yeah it is. Meanwhile... Oh! I didn't tell you! I came to Dallas on Friday to visit friends. I'm thinking of turning it into a whole Pilgrimage of Sookie thing. Next week maybe I will get kidnapped by a cult, or go back home and find out all my friends are in another cult. That's going to be awesome. I will go and flourish, and never say no to myself. I will tell you how that goes!

Meanwhile, Sam and Daphne are feeding each other cake in a sensuous fashion. I recently learned of the name of a thing I knew about, but didn't know the name of, which is how you get two cakes on your kid's first birthday, one of which is for the real party -- which the kid is barely invited to, because guess what, one-year-olds aren't that interesting at parties -- and the other one, just as nice, is for the one-year-old to do with as she wishes. And the name of that little ritual is even more awesome than the ritual itself: SMASHCAKE! I mention this only because of the Tara/rib-bib puppy magic thing, the way total indulgence and total infantilizing can go hand in hand if you do it wrong, and because of Huxley, and of course because of... Well, you'll see.

Finally, Sam and Daphne kiss after all kinds of wedding cake gets fed back and forth. Figures it would take a literal act of God to make Sam deal with the hot chick in front of him. I mean, Tara had to literally say, "What we are going to do now is fuck." But Daphne has no way of knowing that, and besides, she's under the spell too. "[This is] a great idea! You're sweet as hell, and adorable, and scruffy with that little grey in your hair, and that hot little nose, and damn, boy do you know how to wear a pair of pants." All true, every second. Girl knows what she's talking about. She also knows how to wear a sundress with cowboy boots without looking like a retarded whore, so they have that in common too: the ability to wear clothing.