WEREWOLF NONSENSE

JD catches the kid, and then Alcide jumps on him, and they werewolf-fight -- meaning they do their damndest to not look like idiots while hopping around and growling, like they aren't full-grown men doing this for a paycheck -- and JD calls Alcide "self-righteous," and just before JD brains everybody with a rock, Martha once again appears out of nowhere, to own his ass and be the obvious best Packmaster.

Martha: "This is no way to begin your tenure, by murdering your challenger. Killing him only tarnishes the whole Pack."
JD: "How can you stand up for him?"
Martha: "I am standing up for all of us. Including you."

Alcide goes off into the forest, because fuck these guys. If only. If only that were the end of it. But I doubt highly that it would be.

CAMP BELLEFLEUR

This is the fastest, weirdest scene in the whole thing. It takes five seconds. Terry and Patrick show up, and Lafayette's wearing a head wrap and the whole thing, and Arlene and Holly have witched the place all to hell, candles -- which Terry quickly blows out, because duh -- and everything, and they hold hands after endless bitching, and Lala pretends to do his medium thing, and then immediately it becomes real.

Lafayette: "She here for fucking real this time. Her name is Zaafira. She pissed. And she don't wanna forgive either one of y'all."

Der. And there are ghost effects, and Holly's saying this mortifying shit like, "Ozone! You get that when spirits breach the corporeal plane!" and "I feel an electrical charge! This is definitely spirit activity!" and it's so retarded and then the lady comes into Lafayette's mouth for no reason, and he yells some Arabic for no reason, and then the lady goes back out of him so he can explain what she just said, which is obviously that Terry needs to kill Patrick.

(I was hoping it wouldn't be so explicit -- like at some point Patrick would double-cross Terry for some reason and accidentally die and the ifrit would be like, "I am appeased!" -- but either way this is what needs to happen, for sure. Not that there's any way you could possibly give a shit about Terry after this. He shot a lady in the face like ten times for no reason. That's not one of those things you can do and stay emotionally relevant, even on this show that is mostly about serial killers. Even shitty Hoyt is still better than that.)