Dressed like sisterwives for some reason, Eric and Sookie formally pledge allegiance to the Bill, and it's pretty awesome if you're into that kind of honor-oathbound-morituri te salutamus-soldier thing, for which I am a fairly unsurprising 100% complete sucker.

Eric, bowing his head: "My liege."
Sookie, awesomely: "My... Bill..."

SHIFTER WEREWOLF DOMESTIC SITUATION

Marcus: "Who is this pretty dude playing with my daughter? He smells like a shifter."
Emma: "He's my best friend. We play Barbies together and he helps mommy when her nipples abruptly burst into any given scene."
Marcus: "I get the feeling that he plays Barbies anyway."
Sam: "You are not wrong."
Luna: "Emma, go to your room for a second so that we can discuss the minutiae of our divorce and custody agreements. Sam, just stand here feeling awkward."

On the one hand, Luna didn't get Marcus's voicemail about dropping by, so this possibly violates the part where he can't just show up; on the other hand, Marcus should have been informed about Sam or any other strange men attending to Luna's constant nipples, so that's a problem too. Legal agreements are a hassle for everybody, even those that can turn into animals or people, when they come about in acrimony. That's why you should never have feelings.

Of course, the real deal is that all of this just kind of happened and it's nobody's fault, but this is the biggest episode yet as far as the "never attribute to malice (conspiracy) that which can be attributed to stupidity (coincidence)" Hanlon's Razor theme of the season, so it's just a mess. Especially since we just saw Marcus be totally awesome in several scenes, instead of just being a greasy bad guy with the stupidest hairstyle in the entire state of Louisiana.

Luna threatens to call Marcus's PO, then leaves them standing awkwardly by while she puts Emma to bed; Sam still just wants everybody to like him all the time, even werewolves; Marcus alphas him hard, as they say, and then peaces.

JASON'S CRIBLET