And so the first thing Sookie does is tell Tara she looks awful (which is technically impossible, and invite her -- without being asked, which is her prerogative as a friend and a host, as family -- to take a shower and borrow some clothes. Tara's first question is about Jason, who has been released; she claims she knew he'd go free, but Sookie wasn't so sure. Tara's first question is about Sookie, who wasn't murdered by a vampire in the night like Tara assumed she would be. Tara has no idea how close she came to being half-right, or how completely wrong she is, about who kills who. Sookie looks down, caught, and Tara sighs loudly. "Oh, Sookie! Sometimes you are just plain dumb." Sookie tells her to shut up, because Gran is tolerant and kind, but still a grandmother. "Lucky Gran was already in bed when I got in last night." Tara asks if he bit her, and on her insistence that he didn't -- and again, the opposite is true -- reminds her of the rumor that vampires can hypnotize you, and feed without your knowing. I wish Jason were here for that part, because that part is true.
"Yeah, and black people are lazy, and Jews have horns," Sookie shrugs at her friend, but Adele returns before Tara can do much beyond grunting: this is different! Jews and black people are human, as discovered by the white man and that WAS relatively recently! Tara brings up Jason and Adele fusses over the coffee: "I can't even believe that they arrested him to begin with. I have a good mind to call Bud Dearborne and chew him out. Jason's a good boy, everybody knows that." Tara and Sookie grin about that, over the table, over a grandmother's selective blindness. The phone rings, the gossip grapevine, and Adele takes it into the parlor, exclaiming excitedly.
Sookie apologizes for being a bitch to Tara last night (specifically, telling her that Jason will never love her, which is pretty bitchy in all honesty) and Tara apologizes for mother-henning Sookie about the bloodsucking fiend she seems intent on dating. "I just worry about you, Sookie. You're basically my only friend..." These two girls, who have more in common than anyone else on earth: both unnatural, both slightly freaky, both terrified of seeing or showing too much. Jason enters, looking for breakfast, and Tara basically does a flip in the air trying to get his attention. "Hey, hey Jason. I'm so glad they didn't lock you up." He nearly makes a sour face, for being reminded, and whines that "somebody heard [he]'d been with Maudette." The girls ask if he was; Sookie's all, "Are you sure? She was a woman." Which is only so-so funny, but exists on the page only to set up his retort: "That's funny. At least she was human." So I guess it goes: Men, then women without sex lives, then everybody else on earth, then total whores (aka women with sex lives), and finally vampires. That's the official rubric. Good to have that out of the way, because I had been wondering, but I can't be entirely fussy about it, because of all the things that Jason Stackhouse is allowed to do to you -- which is of course a very long list if you have any taste at all -- choking you while he comes should never be on it, which is just like common sense, so Maudette Pickens actually kind of was a gross whore, self-esteemwise. Bless her heart.