Jason brings pizza into the living room from the kitchen, all, "Oh, man. I wanna not have sex with you again so bad, you don't even know!" He looks her in the eye and she smiles and walks away, leaving him hanging: "But that V that we did was the last I had." He gets a whiny look -- not panicked, yet, not like before -- and she tells him to chill. "When we need more, we'll go out and get it. Don't be greedy. We'll be okay for a while." She makes so much sense right now, but it's just The Plan. Of course everything's fine right now; the mistake is in thinking things will be this easy forever. "You sure you don't want some? Pepperoni and sausage!" He offers her the breakfast he made: cold pizza from the fridge. "No, thank you. I only eat organic. The cleaner my body is, the more intensely I feel the V."
It all makes sense from this angle, doesn't it? The V wants to be in us, just like orange juice and LSD. These fragments we shore up against our ruins; the whispered legends of childhood and drug addicts, the secret messages on cigarette packs and bottles of beer, the marijuana myths. Eat organic and do some V: you'll see God in another person, you'll be less alone. "Wait, why do you have two televisions in the same room?" He admits the gigantic console below the newer model is busted: "I just keep it 'cause it was my parents'." She wonders if she can ask, then asks how they died. He looks away and says he doesn't talk about it, and her immediate "okay" is so understanding and gentle that it opens the door in him.
It's a dare. He doesn't drop her gaze until he starts talking. "It was a flash flood. They were caught on the bridge down by the Parish Road, and got swept out in the river. My little sister and I were staying at our Gran's while they went out. They didn't think I could look after Sookie by myself, even though I was almost eleven... Sometimes I think ... If I was a better kid, they wouldn't have had to drop us off at Gran's. Then they wouldn't have been on the bridge at the exact point when..." He sighs and drops his pizza, looking at it with disinterest. No more breakfast. Ever again.
"So your grandma raised you after that?" He grins, thinking of her. This is a funeral too. "I moved back here when I was eighteen, even though Gran would have rather kept an eye on me." He admits she died too, a week ago, and Amy is moved. She looks at him with too much understanding, too much gentleness and love, and he closes up tight. Or tries to. "Goddamn. I don't mean to be spillin'. I never do this." Not with anybody? Not even with Sookie? "Least of all her. She brings out the worst in me." She points back my own ugliness. Everyone who visits Fangtasia! is looking for death. He dreamed of fucking Liam when he was wide awake. She brings out the worst in me. "We had this big fight after Gran died, and ... I hit her." He swallows it. "I am the worst brother in the world," he says, horrified and sad. Surprised to hear the words taking form in his mouth and sound so true.