Lafayette texts -- bitch where are you? -- and Franklin throws a tizz about boys texting Tara, so she explains, his hand clamped vampishly strong around her neck, that Lafayette is both her cousin and gay, two words which do not accurately describe the degree to which he is either. Franklin thinks to text back I'm busy bitch but thinks that's too many bitches, so how about like how Lafayette is always calling her hooker, maybe there's something there, and sort of remarks to himself that hooker with his crazy accent sounds like hookah, just associating freely, and finally Tara's like, "Tell him I'm okay. Say trust me, motherfucker." I hope that is a secret message, but I am not sure how even Lafayette could fix this one.

It is at this point that Franklin becomes the best part of the entire show to date. "Trust ... me ... motherfucker. Brilliant! Hey Tara! Watch how fast I type motherfucker! Cool, right?" He texts it very fast, it's true. His eyes are lit up wonderfully and honestly and it's like, on this show nothing is pure. Everybody is good and everybody is bad, because they are people. So it only makes sense that the purest character would also be the guy who likes to kill little old ladies and might show up at your house with a trucker's head and make kissy-kissy noises. Of course he's the only person capable of actual joy, now that Hoyt and Jessica are on the rocks.

Tara -- whose challenge in this episode is not only to make new and different WTF faces in every scene she's in, but somehow to continually top herself with the hilarity and bugged-out nature of her many WTF faces -- is like, "Oh yeah, that fast texting you're doing is amazing, Franklin." But I think her grin at this point is some percentage of real, because wouldn't you sort of want to laugh if this were happening? I like to think part of her remains impressed at how fucked up it all is.

Franklin locks into it like a little kid: "I'll delete it so you can watch again! Look! Look at me!" she stares and thinks that of all the bad dates anybody has ever been on, she keeps upping the ante and blowing the curve for every single one of us: Trust me motherfucker trust me motherfucker trust me motherfucker. "Love you!" Franklin spontaneously yells, tail all a-wag. Not being tied to a bed in my own filth, I sort of feel like it's mutual right now.