True Blood
True Blood

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 532 USERS: B
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They Stuck Me Together With Glue

The little boy, Chancellor Drew, has apparently been keeping recordings of his human-killings, which is pretty bad morally but also very bad for a member of a group that doesn't say dorky things like, as he does in the video, "Die, human! You are food to us!"

Drew: "I'm tacky! Deal with it!"
Roman: "No, see, I got this from an encrypted email that you sent to Sanguinists in at least three countries with the coded message, In sympathy and solidarity."
Drew: "I was infiltrating?"
Roman: "No, girl. But now you are splattered all over the place."
Drew: "I was the most obvious joke in this whole bag of tricks! Of course I am the first to dieeeeee!"

Roman stands around covered in little-boy blood, and thinks about which one of the ones that's left is youngest, because apparently Sanguinism is a young man's game. Everybody else stares and has personal thoughts about all of this, presumably spanning the dial once again. There was less info on this than there was last week, as far as where everybody stands, but I have to give props for the efficient way we've gotten the brushstrokes: Candyman is the most orthodox like Roman, Salome and Barb are political animals, Crazyface Torturer Guy is the obnoxious atheist, etc.

STACKHOUSE

Sookie: "Tara was such a misanthrope she made up this drink as a joke. Triple sec, amaretto, Bailey's."
(My Friend Erik: "Remember when we saw Young Adult and started drinking that one drink she always drinks, even though it was so gross and we called them Young Adults? I'll have a Young Adult, please. Well, now we're drinking this.")
Sookie: "She called it Orange Marzipan. And the people in this town are such alcoholic sugar addicts that it became quite popular..."
Alcide: "Like this bod would even recognize sugar at this point in time. But no."
Sookie: "Do it."
Alcide: "Okay. This is really gross."
Sookie: "I said do it!"
Alcide: "I'm doing it. Of course. Hey, you don't seem like you're very used to being drunk. It's making you incredibly cool and fun, which is like the opposite of how you usually are."

Sookie: "Drunk me is the best me, which should tell you how under control I always have to be. I'm like the Scott Summers of Bon Temps."
Alcide: "That's why everybody calls you retarded all the time, huh?"
Sookie: "That is part of why."

True Blood

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