AUTHORITY

The Boys: "Okay so the people who knew about Russell in the concrete are few, due to our addiction to Sookie's blood. There's the two of us, Alcide and Pam. We know neither of us dug him out, because we were too busy being adorable with each other all last season. And Alcide's the one that called us to tell us about him getting out. So... No wait, that doesn't add up either."

Nora: "I am totally a terrorist! You got me!"
Authority: "Yeah, but who else is?"
Nora: "Just me, as far as people on this show!"
Authority: "We should probably kill her really publicly then. Really lower ourselves to their level."

JASON

Jason: "I can't talk right now, Sook, I'm experimenting with celibacy."
Sookie: "Okay, that can wait. I killed a crackhead that was in my house with a gun and killed my best friend and then we turned her into a vampire."
Jason: "That doesn't sound like you broke any laws or anyth..."
Sookie: "-- Chain me up! Take me away! Handcuff my wrists!"
Jason: "Yeah, but I'm just saying it seems like you were defending your..."
Sookie: "This is pure nepotism and I won't have it! Take me to your paddy wagon!"

Jessica: "I think she's saying she feels guilty and doesn't know how to assuage it, so she's acting insane because she feels like she needs to be punished."
Sookie: "When you put it that way, Princess Jessica, my storyline makes a little more sense this year. Now take me away!"
Jessica: "...Hold up, Tara's a vampire now? That sounds like a trainwreck."

FANGTASIA!

Pam: "Okay, you can hang out in daycare until the end of my shift but then we are going to have a long talk about what's expected of a young la... Where are all the people?"
Eric: "I closed the bar. Also, I am home."
Pam: "Ten more points to House Fairysnatch."
Eric: "Why do you have Tara with you? She's just awful."
Pam: "Oh, uh. She's my daughter now. So."
Bill: "Tara, why don't you escort me into the office while they work things out."

Bill: "So, how come you're all fucked up and burnt? Did you try to kill yourself a bunch? Ah used to do that shit all the time. Ah was a real drag."
Tara: "She used Maker privilege on me. It was paternalistic and weird because she's white and I'm black, but that happens to me in some form every year, so whatever."
Bill: "Ah'm a Confederate soldier. When you start that reverse-racism crap Ah just... Wait, is Sookie okay?"
Tara: "That took about one second longer than I fucking thought it would. Yeah, she's fine. Also, fuck Sookie."
Bill: "For some reason, when you say it Ah can actually hear you. Even though people have been saying exactly that to me for five seasons."