GROSSSSSSSERY STORE

Jason seduces the teacher that fucked him when he was a child, thereby explaining where his healthy interest in sex came from. Because after the nonsense blowback last year from the male-privileged and sheltered internet about how women raping men is the same exact thing as men raping anybody -- because arguing that men and women are socially and physically interchangeable is the next best thing to reserving your outrage for the real world -- what the show needed to do was double down.

Groc PA: "Pop Psychology Sex-Negative Bullshit on Aisle 12!"
Jason: "Fucking you will give me an epiphany about my sexual dysfunction that ever actually existed until now, and then when I toss you aside like garbage it won't matter, because you're a pedophile. This whole thing is so fucking charming and meaningful. Especially in the middle of this gross storyline where Steve Newlin deserves punishment for the simple act of desiring me."
Lady: "I played fucking Anna Draper on Mad Men, you know. One of the most beautiful and subtle characters and storylines in all of TV. I really deserve better than being one more prop in this ongoing, hateful, retrograde joke about how people who enjoy sex deserve violation, or a diagnosis."
Jason: "Just think of yourself as a werepanther, and my dick as a problem."

MERLOTTE'S KITCHEN

Terry: "Arlene, I'm going to go solve this Iraq mystery so our house won't burn down again."
Arlene: "I want a divorce!"
Terry: "You are still the Worst."

Lafayette: "Arlene, have you seen Tara? She died."
Arlene: "I am too busy throwing a shit fit about nothing right now!"
Lafayette: "Okay. Just look out for her, because you're a total racist and it would be amazing if Tara murdered you."

SAM'S OFC

Sookie: "Hey, Sam. Have you seen Tara? She died."
Sam: "No, not at all. Except for how you're psychic... Um, boobs boobs. Only boobs. And Tara is in the walk-in freezer. Aw, damn."
Sookie: "Oh, okay. Listen, is she okay?"
Sam: "No? She's a vampire? And I got the impression that was because of you and Lafayette."
Sookie: "Please don't get judgmental on me about that. You know, like how you enjoy doing about everything that ever happens. Also, I can't tell you details because of how it led to me murdering another somebody."
Sam: "Actually, when Tommy died I kind of rethought some shit and I see where y'all were coming from. I'd say that, desperation and guilt aside, you gave her a kind of life that she can do with whatever she likes."
Sookie: "For telling me I'm right, you are granted one hug. You can even think about boobs while I do it."