True Blood
You Smell Like Dinner

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 2 USERS: A-
YOU GRADE IT
The Lying, The Witch & The Wardrobe

Anyway, spoiler alert! Everybody gets a Native American love interest with dynastic family issues and magic powers! Sookie's will be an Inuit werewalrus! Terry Bellefleur is secretly half-Mayan and turns into a Canadian by the full moon! Naomi is actually a shapeshifting wereasian! Everybody watch out! Watch out for those Skinwalkers!

OUTSIDE MOONGODDESS

Tara: "Hey, baby. How's it goin'? How is your full moon, are you turning into a half-Asian lady?"
Naomi: "Yeah, I was just standing around our house in a half-shirt and about a thousand bracelets, listening to chick music and leaning on stuff. You know."
Tara: "I really miss you. This place is bonkers."
Naomi: "I think I have a gluten allergy."
Tara: "Lesbians."

INSIDE MOONGODDESS

Lafayette: "Where the fuck y'all gonna get a dead body?"
Zoom! It's Eric: "Excuse me, y'all are lookin' for a dead body?"

Lafayette is up on and on the other side of the room faster than a vamp even can move, so of course Eric does his usual thing of flirting with him -- "Oh Lafayette! I didn't know you were a witch!" -- and as usual Lafayette is not playing along. Things are tense. The witches don't know that necromanting is a bad deal -- they just know that Eric is very large and very scary, very much a thing that disturbs Lafayette's legendary cool, very much the quintessential vampire, and very likely to murder all of them where they sit. In their caftans, on their cushions, breathing the candled air and chatting about raising dead bodies.

FANGTASIA!

Sookie takes a bathroom break from waiting on Eric and overhears Jessica sucking on that beautiful guy in the next stall over, and it's such a great scene.

Fella: "You are so fuckin' beautiful! What's your name again?"
Sookie, tapping on the divider: "...Um, Jessica?"
Jessica, looking trapped and hangdog: "...Sookie?"
Sookie: "Can I talk to you for a second?"

They come out and chat, and the whole time the kid is bleeding out in the stall, and they totally ignore him so they can have a fight about how Jessica is cheating on Hoyt. In a bathroom stall. Jessica gets all kinds of righteous about how Sookie can't even start with her because of how bad she hurt and continues to hurt Daddy Bill -- I can't wait to see what their relationship is like now, a year later -- and Sookie's like, "I'm not trying to start shit, I just actually care about you."

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True Blood

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