True Blood
You Smell Like Dinner

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 1 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
The Lying, The Witch & The Wardrobe

Jessica: "Stop acting like my stepmom! I hated it before and I like it even less now!"

Aww. That was like the coolest Sookie ever was, before she started spitting in werewolves' faces and garbage-disposalling people's boyfriends and wrecking shop all the time. Remember? How Bill and Eric were so gay in their tracksuits shopping for Jess, and Bill was like Sookeh don't you pick mah kid up from school and Sookie was like Ah can do whatever Ah want and she nearly got Jessica's whole gross family murdered? Good times. And then Bill was all Dang it Sookie and Sookie's like, "What." I honestly felt like that was the first time Sookie was a completely real person. It was also the first time you saw the Power of the Stomping, like, her utter disregard for any kind of consequence whatsoever.

Jessica: "This ain't got nothin' to do with you! I can eat who I want! [Slam!] Hold the fuck still!"

Well, now I don't even know what Sookie's plan is, but she heads back out through the protesters -- via more classic, hilarious stomping -- and drives away, telling them to go to hell while she's at it, like, just as an afterthought.

God, I love Sookie when she hates everything. Isn't it the best? She just gets that look in her eye and throws those shoulders back and keeps on stompin'. Fuck it.

THEM MICKENS BOYS

Have this cheesy heart-to-heart about how Sam is finally making friends with other shifters but Tommy is still all alone and whatever. I think this scene could have been better written, in particular, because the key to Tommy is remembering how fast he changed his name to Merlotte. If you remember that, how young and desperate he is, the whole Tommy Deal makes a lot more sense. But instead:

Sam: "What'd you follow me out here for, Tommy?"
Tommy: "I guess I just want us to be brothers."
Sam: "Well, that's gonna be a problem because you don't trust me, and I sure as hell don't trust you."
Tommy: "So then where do we start?"
Sam: "Chip away at it. Try to not trust each other a little less every day."

With this, like, music playing. It's just so annoying to watch that you can't even care. Maybe the cheesiness is so that later on when Tommy kills Sam and turns into a Skinwalker and then that's Sam from now on, it'll be even weirder to remember how dumb this scene was and how much of their butts you constantly had in your face.

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True Blood

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