True Blood
You're No Good

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 7 USERS: A-
The Color Boner

Nicole: "Sorry I was so racist earlier. I am ignorant and kind of mortifying."
Sam: "Thanks for saying that but please leave now so I can fuck everybody's life up."
DWB: "Come on Nic to our next meeting about what other people should be doing with their lives okay."
Lala: "That girl is way too hot for you to be dealing with. She's right that everybody needs help. Now, you listen to me when I say that I love you because you gave me a job when Bon Temps didn't want me and you have always treated me with respect. I am in your storyline for good, boyfriend."


Ginger: "Well, well, well. What do my crazy fucking eyeballs see but my old boss pretending to be here to fuck me. I can barely keep it together so I guess come in."

There's a funny sequence -- by the way, Ginger hangs out at home in some hilarious clothes like a wastelands strider, all panties and ripped-up shortie housecoat and rollers in her crazy-person hair, she looks like Tan Mom -- in which Ginger must invite Eric into the house, then Pam, then Tara appears, and finally she's just like, "This does not end with Eric Northman fucking me, I think. Even I, the blind squirrel called Ginger, can locate a factual nut every now and then."

Eric: "I promise to have sex with you, but not today. I'm sleeping with Willa in the coffin tonight, Tara and Pam can have the cubby."
Sassy Lesbians: (Complain for a second until he points out that it's the only way to keep Pam from murdering Willa while he's asleep, which they all realize is fair.)


Jessica: "Bill, the sun's coming up. Get your ass inside, please."
Bill: "Hang on while I crazy-talk like I'm in a cult. Stop trying to drag me out of the sun! I walk through fire and I get staked and everything is fine! Let me be an immortal prophet!"

Jessica makes more of this than she really needs to. Let him blow up on fire, and then drag his dumb ass off to bed. Stop screaming about it. Even for Jessica, it's kind of a leap that she would act this insane.

Bill, not so much. He does it in the most Bill Compton possible way, with his arms spread wide, and she watches through the necro glass, and then of course he catches on fire and stumbles screaming toward the door, and it's just ... so embarrassing and just so Bill Compton.

They cry, Bill because he's still very confused about what is going on and partly because the sun just hurt his feelings, and Jessica because of all the things for Bill to hang onto in his next incarnation, "acting all Bill" was the one thing he didn't need to bring along.

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True Blood




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