Twisted
Grief is a Five Letter Word

Episode Report Card
Carla Sparks: D | 3 USERS: A
YOU GRADE IT
What Happens in the Clubhouse…
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Regina Crane is dead and no one is particularly moved. Lacey's speech at Regina's funeral causes Jo to flash back to memories of when she and Danny and Lacey were friends and had a fort in the woods. This time will be referred to as BTJRM, Before The Jump Rope Murder. After the funeral, Jo and her family greet Lacey with condolences. Lacey says that "in a weird way" Regina's death has brought everyone closer together. United by a common enemy, no doubt. Jo's dad, who is a cop of indeterminate rank, wants to take Lacey in for questioning and advises her not to associate with Danny Desai right now. He is the big person of interest.

Danny is reading the local paper, The Green Grove Gazette. What small town can still do a daily newspaper? The very long headline of this newspaper reads, "Crane Murder Investigation Remains Inconclusive, but Local Residents Cast Blame" and a very creepy-looking picture of Danny is below. Libel! Denise Richards tells her son Danny that she read the paper earlier that morning because she wakes up to do Pilates. Denise tells Danny that he should do everything possible to clear his name, but Danny says he won't use Lacey as an alibi. Sleeping in the same room is not a good enough alibi for activities around 2 AM, evidently.

Denise Richards is worried that her son will go to real jail this time. She tells Danny that "the Mastersons" can't be trusted. Danny agrees that Kyle Masterson is a total dick, but isn't sure what Denise Richards has against Tess, Jo's mom. I don't either, since Tess has no discernible personality. Danny says he's not worried since the police don't have solid evidence... or so he thinks! This episode's ham-fisted focus on the necklace tells us otherwise.

Lacey and Regina's former crew, Serita, Stupid Scott and Lacey's crappy boyfriend Archie leave the funeral, agreeing that Regina would love the attention. Local news crews are interviewing this new character Phoebe. She delivers a flat monologue that is supposed to be funny in that way where we're laughing at her like, "Haha what a dumb bitch." Lacey reports that Phoebe and Regina haven't been friends for months and last they spoke, Phoebe told her she'd see her in hell. That's not in a murderer way, though. Lacey's boyfriend totally did it.

"Let's get some PIZZA," the meatheads agree.

At the diner, Danny dines with Rico and Jo. Rico, like me, is a murder mystery enthusiast. He notes that in murder mystery parlance, text messages are a red herring. Rico calls it a weak case unless they have something to connect Danny to the crime scene. Rico does not know about the necklace. Rico is my favorite inocente, especially because he and I both claim Murder, She Wrote as our favorite show and Jessica Fletcher as our favorite character. She's not the best model for solving this crime, though. Rico says Jessica Fletcher would start with the people closest to the victim. Lucky for this gang, Scott, Archie and Serita are all terrible people.

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Twisted

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