The Suarez family heads to Guadalajara to work out Ignacio's immigration problems. While there, Hilda, Betty, and Justin meet their extended family on Ignacio's side, including a random old woman who has magical powers like seeing into the future and finding a lost earring. She tells Betty some stuff about a tree branch that seems like nonsense, but is actually really wise. Despite Ignacio's evasion tactics, Betty manages to get some info about her mother's side of the family from her aunt. Turns out that the grandmother she had long thought dead is in fact alive, but had disowned her mother when she married Ignacio. Betty follows a Henry hallucination to a blue house, where her grandmother, whose mind is now addled, mistakes her for her mother, and makes amends. She also gives Betty some of her mother's clothes, and Hilda finds her perfect wedding dress. And just in time, too, as a foot-massaging stranger tries to convince her that she's meant to be with him. Said foot-massaging stranger also finds out who Ignacio is and makes a serious-sounding call that promises exacted revenge. This is bad news, since the immigration stuff didn't go so well and it looks like Ignacio will be in Guadalajara for a while. Back at Mode, Alexis has to face her past when Jordan, her last girlfriend when she was Alex, takes part in a photo shoot. Daniel, who is super-wacky on the junk, wastes no time moving in, and Jordan seems into him until she admits that she still has unresolved feelings about Alex. This sends him straight to a dealer for more wacky no-sex pills, and it appears as the episode ends that he's about to be pummeled by some toughs. Meanwhile, Bradford goes through a bit of a mid-life crisis and tries to become the free-wheeling "Brad" he once was. Wilhelmina gives him some line about ruining all other men for her, and he finally signs his divorce papers. And finally, Wili gives Tavares a showing and he gays it up and gives Amanda the shaft. Marc finds out and totally comes to her rescue. He "ins" Tavares, but no one really cares. They do, however, care about his bad taste in buttons. Marc and Amanda celebrate by raiding the Mode closet, and in dong so find Fey's love dungeon. Things are about to get really interesting, and just in time for the finale!
Previously on Ugly Betty: Wilhelmina gave Marc the pleasure of decking her and putting her in a neck brace, then pinned the whole thing on Claire. It was all to get Bradford to file for divorce, and it worked. Alexis, meanwhile, is doubly set on revenge against Bradford and it sounds like she's going to have him taken out. An almost passed-out Henry told Betty that he loved her. Charlie, though she didn't hear that particular bit of information, nonetheless figured out that something was up between the two of them and told Betty to back off. Daniel's mentor in sex addiction gave him some wacky drugs from "overseas," which I'm sure is Step 2 in the Program. Amanda took up with a designer named Tavares who was pretending to be gay to get ahead. And meanwhile, the Suarez family dealt with the fact that Ignacio is being sent back to Mexico to get his visa.
We enter with Betty walking down the stairs of her house and yelling to the others that the taxi will be there in five minutes. She tries to lug her huge bag but goes flying down the stairs, then yells to her uninterested family, "I'm okay!" Justin comes down the stairs with a pink suitcase and notes that there is no worse time for a trip, given that he's understudying the lead in West Side Story. He says, "God forbid Joey Colano takes ill and I don't know my finger snaps for the rumble.'' Foreshadowing? Hey, a girl can dream. Betty tells him that they're only going to be in Mexico for a few days while Ignacio gets his visa. As a bonus, they're going to get to meet all their family members who are still there, and to practice their Spanish. Betty says something in Spanish, and Ignacio translates it to "I just ate your niece." They'll put anything in a quesadilla, I guess. Meanwhile, Hilda is on the phone with Santos, reminding him sternly that he's in charge of getting the reception hall. When she gets off the phone, she notes that she's given Santos one job, and he's pawning it off on her. Betty says that maybe they can find Hilda a wedding dress in Mexico, and Hilda starts freaking out about all the stuff she has to do. Ignacio really could have found a way to get deported at a better time. How selfish!
The phone rings, and Betty says they don't have time to answer it, so she puts it through to the answering machine. Turns out it's Henry. Squuuuuuuuueeeeeee! Henry messages that he knows she's nervous about flying, so he wanted to tell her that statistically, she's worse off driving to the airport than being on the plane. He then notes that if she's hearing him, it means she's still at home. So, really, no help. Hilda says that the whole thing is sweet but geeky. And I mean, Henry should open a store called Sweet N' Geeky. That sells, like, candies in the shape of Dungeons And Dragons characters. Hilda asks why Betty didn't pick up, and Betty says that Henry has a girlfriend, and Betty is done with him. If it were meant to be, it wouldn't be so hard. Now, where would John and Rebecca Romijn-Stamos be if they thought like that? Oh, wait. Betty deletes the message.