Betty calls Hilda in Flushing, but can only get the actual noteworthy part -- how she just made a professional sale -- out before her family rightfully begins to congratulate her. Ignacio and Justin get on extensions, and they're all totally excited for her, but of course Betty will not have this, so she explains to them about how the cruel, cruel world of editors and people who are not terminally boring has once again conspired to do their best to help her redeem her own cluelessness. "All I did was a pitch a shitty article about thought-provoking basketry and they tried to make it salable as a favor to me! I blame Amanda!" They ask her what the fucking problem is, and she can't quite figure it out, so she just repeats herself a few more times while they tell her to stop manufacturing drama and actually do her best like we always thought she was doing.
"Okay, let's grip it and rip it," says Amanda, which is amazing on many levels because it means so many things. Grooming and depilation, Amanda's predilection for use-once-and-dispose catchphrases, the floating violent/intimate signifiers, band-aid gumption, it's all Amanda and it's all right there. Betty says before they grip or rip, they need two rules: "One: nothing illegal, Two: we can only do things that normal Mode readers can do." Amanda creates on-the-fly hand signals for both rules: "Got it. No crimes, real peeps. Saddle up."
Meanwhile, Daniel's asking Claire which of the two unflattering ties he's holding will be more flattering, and she toys with him for awhile before pointing out that he's essentially dating somebody else's girl, and that Molly is into him. He goes all soft and sweet about that, so she slaps the shit out of him several times and reminds him that their entire family has been torn apart multiple times by just this kind of slutting around, and makes him promise not to screw around with Molly. He tries to tell her it's not a date, and she tells him exactly how this fundraiser is going down: "And she'll look stunning, and the booze will be flowing, and given your weakness for having sex in public places..." He whines that it was one time, and not public flagrante until they unexpectedly moved the truck he was boning behind, and she's like, whatever. The Meades are not like us in many ways, but their ongoing comfort with discussing each other's sex lives is one of the biggies. "A nothing moment can turn into something huge. Just stay away, and write her a big check." His mouth says yes but his eyes say "No way."