Ugly Betty

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | Grade It Now!
Betty Bobs Her Hair

Betty notices that Amanda's adorable one-piece sheath dress is actually made from her leggings, and Amanda's like, "I know, cute, right? And the other leg makes a matching scarf!" Christina approves, getting a big eye from Betty, and Betty runs away. Amanda follows them, all about "I know who your lover is!" Her next guess is "that troll in 3G" who walks his guinea pig on a leash: "When are you two crazy kids going out?" Betty still hasn't noticed that Amanda has now chosen her, so she blows it off again and says the guy doesn't even for sure like her, and Amanda's like, "Invite him to the Mode party!" Christina agrees, because if Betty's luck holds and she's just living in crazytown, it won't be awkward or cause him to break her heart because it won't even really be a date, and Amanda points out that it will also give him the option, should he turn out a serial killer, to find someone else to cut into pieces. "YA WELCOME!" she says, and bounces. Betty and Christina agree that this is the perfect low-risk way to take things to the next level.

Marc's looking delectable in a v-striped sweater with intensely big Jimmy Dean hair when Cliff jumps up from behind his computer screen. "Hey, Big Tiny!" Marc exclaims, which Cliff thinks is not as cute as Marc does, and Marc gives a speech about how after work they have to go to Prune because he's dying for a parsley and dandelion salad and if he doesn't get one, swear to Barbra, he will throw a fit with the fury of a thousand queens. Do people talk like this? Cliff is like, "Move in with me." Marc is thrown, because Marc has no idea what acting like a fruitcake does to those burly top photogs, and starts to wig out. Cliff shoots some serious puppydogs about how they're together all the time right so it just makes sense right right huh right? And Marc basically throws the table against the wall in the intensity of his flight. Marc, comes on. Cliff just watches the debris settle in the wake of Marc's instant egress like, "Girl, you are a mess."

Betty gets stalky again and ambushes Jesse, but then fucks it up with babbling about how the Mode party is for global warning, not for-for it because it's evil but for like awareness, and she has to find the band and blah blah and it's like a Far Side cartoon about What Dogs Hear because all Jesse heard in the babbling was the word "band," so his hands go insane in the air as he thanks her for inviting him to play this huge fashion party and not out on a date at all, which saved him from some dire fate he will now write into a song and then he runs off to squeal to his real friends, and says she's like a Snow Day, which is Christmas for slackers, and then Betty stares into space and wonders where she fucked this one up exactly.

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Ugly Betty




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