Daniel makes some sarcastic remark about being all cleaned up, then turns so that Betty sees his giant black eye. Betty asks if Alexis was responsible. I love how everyone knows that, balls or no, Alexis can totally kick the crap out of Daniel if given the opportunity. Daniel tells Betty that in fact, he got the black eye when he saved a Girl Scout who had fallen into the lake at Central Park. In diving in -- you know, to save her -- he hit his head on a rock. Do you think that if a person actually did this, they'd get a lifetime supply of Girl Scout Cookies? Because if so, I am going to start wandering the streets looking for a Scout in distress. If any of you are willing to facilitate the process by pushing a Scout into a river or in front of a bus or something, I'll give you 30% of the cookie profit. Daniel tries to play it off, because it is a lie, and a stupid one at that, but he can't stop Betty from being impressed. She says that he's a hero and that he deserves the sombrero after all. She is proud. Daniel is ashamed. Variation on a theme.
We cut to a little red box placed next to the head of a sleeping Wilhelmina. She turns over with a smile and says, "I thought I smelled jewelry." No Tiffany's blue box? For shame, Bradford. Bradford says that the box is his way of thanking her for giving him a second chance at happiness. And I totally thought that she was going to open it and find, like, cufflinks or something. Fake out! But in fact, Bradford asks if Wili will spend the rest of her unscrupulous, conniving life with him. She beams, and says she will. She then opens the box to find a gaudy, diamond encrusted flower ring. Ha! It's a small price to pay for all the evildoing, but still. Daniel says that it represents the blooming of their love. It also represents the fact that he has no taste. Wili says that she's deliriously happy, and feels like she's in a fairy tale. Bradford says that he's her beautiful princess. Yeah, maybe. But I still wouldn't take any apples from her. Wili rolls her eyes, because she still can't stand Bradford.