Christina and Betty chat, and Christina's worried about the level of stress Betty is under, as well as the fact that she hasn't called Henry. Betty says there's too much other important stuff going on and she can't be bothered, before slamming face-first into a huge mock up of the next Mode cover with the headline, "love hurts." Indeed.

Amanda and Marc head home to visit her hoity-toity suburban parents in the "house of lies." Amanda calls for her mother, adding, "if that is her real name." Her parents are not prepared for an unexpected mid-afternoon visit as they descend the stairs in some kicky sleepwear. They deny keeping any secrets, and instantly the Ted and Alice to their Bob and Carol slink down the stairs in matching blue silk robes. Amanda says she can't do it. Which, I think the post-traumatic stress disorder from finding out that your parents are swingers might make you block out just about everything. But Marc blurts out that Amanda found a birth certificate saying Fey is her real mother.

Cut to Betty at the hospital, who doesn't have a concussion but does have to wear an eye patch. Pirate Betty! Henry would be getting so hot right about now. The doctor tells her to slow down, as her heart rate and blood pressure are a little high. Betty has to get to Ignacio's lawyer's office and rushes out the door.

Back at Case de Old-Ass Foursome, Amanda learns that she's adopted and mows on some candy. It's just like that girl who found out that Joni Mitchell was her mom! Except I don't even want to know what Big Yellow Taxi is code for with these guys. Amanda yells that she can never trust her parents again and storms out.