Ugly Betty

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Jessica: B- | Grade It Now!
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Queens For A Day

We open on Betty, trying desperately to get past a doorman into a club, where, as she tells him, they're having a party for her boss. As you can imagine, on this particular evening, she does not look like the kind of girl who successfully talks her way past the doorman, and she's not having much luck getting in. To put on my nitpicking hat for a moment -- and a mere three sentences in! -- I must say it's seriously unlikely that there isn't a guest list for this event -- one Betty would already have seen, dealt with, and put her own name on already, at the office. ["As Daniel's assistant, she probably would have had to be at the location overseeing things before the event even started." -- Wing Chun] At any rate, the doorman is unmoved. Betty frantically searches her purse for her "Xeroxd card" -- I don't have any idea what the hell that could be -- but has no luck. She's digging through her bag when Amanda sweeps up past the line and into the party. "She knows me! Amanda!" Betty cries. Amanda ignores her. The doorman looks down at her and says, "Sweetheart, why don't you come back on Monday night? That's when we let anybody in." I have to give him some credit: he really tells her this very nicely. The he lets in a load of swankily dressed folks, as Betty finally finds and shows him her "Xeroxed card." OH. It's her Xerox card! Like, her access card for the Mode copy machine. Oh, honey. That just proves you work at an office somewhere. Sometimes Betty makes me sad.

Cut to a nattily-dressed journalist outside the club, reporting from the scene, presumably for something like FashionTV. The reporter is played by Greg Proops, whom I know slightly and who, I must admit, is totally divine. He also has tremendously good taste in clothing in real life. So, yay Greg! Greg tells us that it's "nothing but trendy and Fendi here for Daniel Meade's cover party, as we celebrate his first issue of Mode on the stands." Poor Greg then recaps, for approximately the kazillionth time, the path Daniel took to the EIC's chair. Inside the bar, people swarm around Daniel and take his picture. While he poses, Evil Marc comes scampering up to Wilhelmina, handing her a drink, and filling her in on what happened before she arrived: "Heidi Klum's a no-show, Isaac's in the back getting sloppy [I do hope he means Mizrahi], and wait until you see Veronica Jansen's facelift! Lawsuit!" he sings. I adore him. Wilhelmina is disgusted by the sight of New York's reporters falling all over Daniel, sniffing, "As if he actually knew anything about fashion. He went to Vera Wang's spring line and gave her a high five." Considering that Vera Wang's father died the morning of her spring/summer runway show this year, that was, indeed, extremely inappropriate. Across the room, Daniel raises his glass to Wilhelmina, and she plasters a fake smile on her face and waves back. You know, I get that she's evil and all, but if I were in her position, I would probably hate Daniel too. And also want to sleep with him. Which would therefore make me hate him more. Damn. I've said too much already.

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Ugly Betty

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