What the -- we're back? Really? Well, good! I guess.
Mode is still in trouble, because the Sex Issue (remember? Last episode? It happened about a month ago?) tanked. And meanwhile, Betty's super-rich boyfriend is giving her limo rides and inviting her to incredibly exclusive Easter egg parties hosted by his mega-rich father, who rescues struggling magazines for fun. But he's far too rich to meet with Daniel, even though Betty's promised Daniel that it will happen. Awkwardness ensues, and Betty ends up selling out her relationship with Matt so she can get Daniel a meeting with the legendary Cal Hartley. Betty gets forgiven, but Daniel has to hop around like a bunny before the magazine gets miraculously saved.
The money troubles don't appear to be impacting Wilhelmina's plot, which I assume is because she lives in a bubble of richness. Her issue is that the baby doesn't look a lot like her, but it does look a bit like Christina. That's what all the characters claim, anyway. It just looks like a generic baby to me. So Marc has to find out if Christina maybe had sex before the insemination. The baby might really be hers! Which suggests that someone on the writing team saw Baby Mama! But a DNA test says it's Wili's, so never mind, I guess.
Oh, and Amanda claims to be the Einstein of having sex. She also has a pornographic memory. It's like she's spent the last month thinking of weird sex-related things to say. Which is pretty much her job on the show at this point, so I approve. And then she's fired and replaced with a flower and a sign, but she comes back when things get fixed.
We open on a montage of Daniel and Wili riding in subways and busses. It's hilarious, see, because they're rich, which means that they don't know how to take public transit. Meanwhile, Betty is getting out of a limo at Meade Publications. What? Is this Crazy Upside-Down Land? No, this is how they're reminding us that Betty has a super-rich boyfriend named Matt. Well, that and the Previouslies.
Matt tells Betty that while he's not really a limo guy, he's prepared to give her anything she wants, suggesting that Limo Tuesday be followed up with Hot Air Balloon Wednesday and Submarine Thursday. Those sound like fun, but I'm not sure they're practical ways to get to work. I don't think Meade Publications has an underwater entrance. Betty claims to have a Grand Unified Theory of Happiness: "With us so good, how can work be bad?" Looks like Betty's never heard of the Theory of Ironic Foreshadowing, also known as the "At least it's not raining!" corollary.
Inside the Mode offices, Betty steps out of the elevator and is almost run over by a giant television. Workmen are removing the office furnishings! There goes that one orange thing I liked! Betty rescues a bunny and confronts Amanda, who is telling people to please hold. Marc swoops in and he and Amanda deliver the exposition. Marc: "The Sex Issue was a limp noodle! And now they're cutting the budget to the bone!" Amanda explains that "everything leased or nonessential has to go," which means that they were leasing the ugly orange furniture. There's a place that makes that stuff? And they actually want it back?
Suddenly! A man in a suit arrives and says he's looking for Betty Suarez. Marc offers to help load her onto the truck, but he's delivering a gold suitcase and needs Betty to sign for it. She signs several times, initials once, and gives her thumbprint, which is weird because she's doing it all on one of those portable electronic things the UPS people have been using. The man declares that "The Calvin Hartley Foundation requires positive identification of all recipients," which gets Daniel's attention. Daniel repeats "Hartley Charitable Foundation" a few times and finally explains that every year, Cal Hartley hosts a charitable Easter Egg Hunt at the Natural History Museum. It's very exclusive and Daniel's always wanted to go, but the invitation (which is in the form of a bejeweled egg) is to Betty. Because Cal is Matt's father. Daniel: "Of course, Matt Hartley. I don't know why I never put that together." So that explains why no one ever realized that Matt is one of the super-rich elite, I guess. As he fails to hide his disappointment, Daniel refers to the invitation as "the eggvite", which I'm not sure I approve of. Betty apologizes to Daniel, who's mumbling about the party having billionaires and princesses and popes.