Ugly Betty
Sisters On The Verge Of A Nervous Breakdown

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: F | 1 USERS: F
TV Is A Medium

Betty checks in with Daniel, and notes that she needs to get his vacation photos back from Suzuki. Daniel immediately gets panicky, and she realizes that they are special photos. She assumes they're filth, because he's asked her to print out filth before, but of course it's much worse! He's dating a girl! He quickly confesses this to Betty, and she keeps calling Molly "Connor's Molly," and he swears that they are totes in love, whatever bleh, and he freaks out because Molly wanted to keep it a secret, and even though Betty is standing in a hospital far away from them, she promises to get them back, so Daniel doesn't have to interrupt his busy schedule of standing around looking hot and not doing anything for himself. Betty tries to get in to tell Papi she's leaving his ass there, but she can't go in because they're doing tests on him, and the nurse tells her it's going to be at least four hours, so just go do your thing. The nurse promises to tell him where she's at, and she goes to visit Suzuki.

Whom I've always found annoying because he's a grotesque unreal stereotype that teaches us to assume the worst about gay men, which is that they're unintelligent and shallow and consumed with fascination for women's clothing and eternal youth, which is why they don't deserve the rights that adults in the country deserve, such as marriage, because it's laughable to presume that two gay men getting married would be any less disastrous than Juliette Lewis and Giovanni Ribisi getting married, in real life or in the film The Other Sister, because they're not really adult men like regular adult men, they're weird bitchy aliens, the best shopping buddies, the ones who always say what we're thinking but can't say out loud, because our opinions actually matter and would have consequences: Every king needs a jester, and every girl needs a Suzuki St. Pierre. And it's nothing I've not said before, but if you told me there was something even more annoying that could happen with Suzuki St. Pierre, I would have called you a liar and boxed your ears. And that would be uncool of me, because you would have been right.

So Suzuki tells Betty, rightly, to eff off because he's not interested in playing nice, because pictures of Daniel Meade having an affair with his CFO's fiancée are, at the least, sort of interesting. Sort of. Betty's all, but they broke up so it's not even scandalous! But Suzuki saw that quibble coming, and says that it could be even more scandalous because what if he stole her away for a sexy Caribbean getaway, and she asks him to kill the story as a personal favor. Of course, he asks her if he's supposed to know who the heck she is, and they do the whole song and dance about how they've met like a hundred times. Which would be funnier if they hadn't all happened in this season and we weren't getting callbacks to shit from five seconds ago.

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12Next

Ugly Betty




Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP