Ugly Betty

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Jessica: B- | Grade It Now!
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Trust, Lust And Must

Over in Queens, Hilda, because she is no dummy, is waiting outside Ms Tone for Leah Lawyer. When she shows up, Hilda asks her whether she's ever done any immigration work. Leah, luckily enough, has. "You in some kind of trouble?" she asks. Hilda wonders if what she says next will be considered privileged, and Leah says that only works if Hilda is her client. That said, she gives her word that she'll keep whatever Hilda tells her to herself, and it'll only cost her a cup of coffee and a bialy. I might love Leah.

At Mode, Wil's Blood Money Check leans against Betty's old abused Graduation Bunny, which is nice to see, if only as a nod to continuity. Wil strolls over and notes that Betty hasn't cashed the check yet. Betty says that she just hasn't had the chance. "Or haven't made the effort? Steel yourself, Betty. Think about what's best for you. That's how we survive in this business," Wil says, not entirely unkindly, as Amanda races in and tells Wil to get down to the lobby. "It's Nico," she says. Wil scampers off and Amanda turns to Betty. "You too," she says. "I think we might actually see a live execution."

So, Nico is holding a press conference in the lobby, wearing a loin cloth and tube top made out of what looks like suede and screaming that fur is murder. "The Must Mode Issue promotes the unwarranted slaughter of innocent animals," she yells to the assembled journalists and photogs, as well as Amanda, Marc, Daniel, and assorted others from the office. She yaps and yaps and yaps, until Wil finally makes her entrance, wearing a mink coat and only a mink coat. Bravo. Wil smiles, apologizes for being late, thanks everyone for coming, brings Nico into "the good light," and informs the assembled that this is the "Must Debate of 2007: animal rights versus fashion rights. Just who IS right?" And at this brilliant bit of showmanship, everyone applauds. Even the press. Nico looks sulky as Wil tells everyone to read the issue, on sale in January, and dismisses them.

Once everyone leaves -- well, everyone from the press; everyone from Mode sticks around to watch the mother/daughter fireworks -- Nico tells Wil that she wins; she will go to school in France, but she really wishes that Wil would start acting like her mother. "But I guess you don't have a clue where to start," Nico says bitterly. "Is that armor so thick you can't even feel anything anymore?" Not to be unsympathetic to Nico, but: BORING. It's like when Alexis Carrington's children would complain that she was too mean on Dynasty. Do they not understand that her meanness is what makes her awesome? That, and her turbans? Wilhelmina looks sad, and all of her coworkers look awkward. Why are they still even watching? Slink back to your desks and give the woman some privacy, whilst gossiping furiously about this on instant messenger. Nico delivers her final blow, saying that Wil's number one Must is learning how to act like a mother, and finally, everyone scatters. Wil looks sad. She needs to stop being sad and start being awesome again.

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Ugly Betty

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