Undeclared
Undeclared

Episode Report Card
Heathen: B+ | 1092 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
God Visits

As soon as Sheila, her plant, her stack of textbooks, and her moment in the sun have passed through the suite door, Rachel and Lizzie squeal and run to check out their brand-new room. "We could totally deck this place out," Rachel gasps. Shaggy envisions whipping it into an orgy of red paint and floor pillows. "We could call it the Poochy Palace," Heath offers. Shaggy leaps into action. "The Poochy PARTY Palace!" he shouts triumphantly. Wha? I don't understand. But Rachel is delighted, so maybe the word "Poochy" is some sort of skank magnet. Shaggy wants them to have a party there as soon as possible. Lizzie laments the fact that she's got a double Bio lab and a ton of work to do. Heath smugly grins that he's got rehearsal. "I'm the star of my class," he nods knowingly. Shaggy is totally fine with them not helping, because it means he can be alone with Rachel and inhale the intoxicating fumes of her push-up bra all by himself. "We can do it," he intones, shimmying closer to Rachel. "The Marsh-man, the Rach-inator." She giggles as they survey the room. "We could make some magic in here," he whisper-growls. We fade into the credits wondering if his magic wand is even functional.

A cordless phone rings in the Frosh Pit. Ron and Steven stare at it, because they know it isn't theirs, and if it isn't theirs, it's Lizzie's, and if it's Lizzie's, then the caller is Eric, and the guys can imagine no fresher hell than talking to a guy who's an expert at silk-screening and lamination. Finally, Ron gives up and answers it. "Hi Eric," he says. "Who the hell is this?" snaps Eric. "Why are you answering Lizzie's phone?" Ron tries to be polite, replying that Lizzie simply left it there, and finishing with, "It's Ron! Heyyy..." But Eric interrupts him. "What the hell was Lizzie doing in your room?" he snarls. Ron suddenly snaps. "We were making sloppy love, Eric," he booms. "It was heavenly." Steven shakes his head in amusement, but also pity, because he knows the pain Ron's about to endure. "WHAT?" screeches Eric. "Give the phone to Lizzie!" On cue, Lizzie innocently trots out of her room. "Did I hear my phone ring?" she asks. Steven tells her it's Eric, who is still raging at Ron. "You shut up!" shouts Ron. "You shut up," Eric retorts. "YOU SHUT UP!" Ron yells one last time before handing the phone to Lizzie. "Hey baby," she says, confused. "Well, I guess you weren't in the library studying, were you, baby?" Eric sneers. She admits she wasn't, and confesses that they're decorating what she calls "a home office." Yeah, the Office of Beer. As she leaves, we hear her wonder why Eric feels the need to check on her constantly.

Undeclared

Comments

SHARE THE SNARK

X

Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP