DAMON: You caught everyone up on the drinking game rules and then criticized them, when really, people are never fussy about drinking game rules, unless the rules don't let them drink.
JEREMY: Katherine fed me to Silas, which killed me. Also, she made me crash my car. Can I drink twice?
ELENA: Only because you played your round before the show's biggest hypocrite arrived.
TARA: You think you know what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.
RECAPPER: Leave. Don't make me get Warren. Tara has a point though. By episode's end, Elena has a challenger to the throne.
MATT: Vicki is dead because of Katherine.
DAMON: Let's make this more about me.
ELENA: Jeremy, you're cut off.
AUDIENCE: In this town, you should say "shut.' Someone could take "cut" the wrong way.
ELENA: If anyone's drinking to Katherine's death, it's me. She impersonated me, repeatedly, compelled Jenna to stab herself in the stomach and cut off Uncle Daddy's fingers.
JEREMY: He might have deserved that.
AUDIENCE: Poor Uncle Snark Daddy.
UNCLE JOHN'S GHOST: Occasionally, you can catch me on Once Upon A Time, where I appear as Dr. Victor Frankenstein/Dr. Whale. Bonus, Cindy doesn't hate that show.
RECAPPER: Give me time. Now skeedaddle, you.
BONNIE: Grams died trying to close the tomb Katherine wasn't in.
CAROLINE: It's Katherine's fault Tyler's werewolf curse was triggered.
ELENA: Klaus followed her to Mystic Falls, which is why we lost Jenna.
DAMON: And Alaric.
MATT: We're gonna need more booze.
RECAPPER: Oh, Pudding Pop. Send an immortal for it?
MATT: I can't. It's in the script.
RECAPPER: I have a lighter, fresh paper and spare toner cartridges. I'll write you a new one.
NADIA: No, Cindy, because I need to get Matt alone, so I can kidnap him, bury him alive, and use him as leverage against your Fellowship of the Falls, so I can save my mother.
RECAPPER: Oh, Nadia, you've done just fine without her for more than 520 years. Let it go.
CAROLINE: You guys are going all out of order. Elena says Katherine tried to kill her at least twice. I point out she did kill me, but I'm weirdly better off.
KATHERINE: Upstairs, Stefan is sitting on my bed. I ask if they're talking about me, which doesn't seem like something I'd even bother to ask. The script says I'm supposed to say I deserve everything they're saying. No way would I say that. Next, I move onto more important subjects, like if my hand looks wrinkled. I tell Stefan if I start to sag, anywhere, he's to jab a knife in my carotid.