Vampire Diaries
After School Special

Episode Report Card
Cindy McLennan: A- | 5 USERS: A
The Breakfast Club

Bonnie agrees with me and tells her father he can't just come in and start making rules. Rudy says the town could use some rules and I don't disagree with him. I just think that if you abandon your motherless and grandmotherless child, maybe you should shut your gaping maw, Rudolph! Bonnie reminds her father that she can protect the town. Um... really? Rudy says he's well aware of her "gifts," but, "...don't forget, I'm your father. That means I get to protect you." You're telling her not to forget that you're her father? How about you stop forgetting that you're her father, Rudy. Bonnie's oh please look turns into an I can't even be bothered to argue look. We cut to the...

High School. Carrying the Son of White Oak stake, Caroline is walking down the empty corridors and peering in rooms. Right after she texts Stefan that the second floor is clean, Rebekah Stealth-Salvatores by her. As penance, I'm going to refer to "Stealth Salvatoring" as "vamp running" here. Stefan looks up from his phone and peeks into another room, when he senses that someone has vamp run by him. In a Samsung product placement, Stefan sends a text to Caroline which reads: "1st floor. I'll distract her. You stake her." As soon as he's done typing, Rebekah shows her face. She gives him a little (deserved) crap about him helping Klaus dagger her, makes it clear she wants the cure and pushes Stefan up against the lockers. Stefan spins Rebekah around and pushes her up against the locker, then holds her there with a trademark throttle. Should he be able to do that? Well, maybe she's letting him, because Rebekah smiles, pulls out the Son of White Oak stake and lets him know she already found Care Bear. Commercial.

Rebekah leads Stefan into the library where April, Elena and Caroline are waiting. Rebekah declares class is in session, but I'm so referring to this as her very own Breakfast Club. Noting that her captives have all been compelled, she tells them she has a few questions and wants some honest answers. Everyone is to stay and remain obedient. When Rebekah tells April to take notes as, "...this is how you get answers in this town," the girl takes her literally and starts scribbling.

Playing exposition fairy, Rebekah talks about how back in 1114, the Originals met the Brotherhood of Five -- vampire hunters. She asks the kids what the tattoos are (a map leading to a cure for vampirism). After some more exposition involving the sword, Rebekah notes that since they're all still vampires something must have thwarted their search for the cure. It's then that she asks April what she's doing. The girl looks up. "Taking notes." Rebekah says, "I wasn't being literal, darling, but now that you mention it, a flowchart would be nice, which means index cards and pushpins. Go fetch." I'd laugh harder, but I'm a little bitter that the flowchart never materializes. You can't just promise flowcharts all willy nilly and then not follow through, Show.

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Vampire Diaries




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