All Elena Gilbert wants is a normal day, culminating in a ferris wheel make-out session with her not-at-all normal vampire boyfriend, with no mention of the D(amon) word or the V(ampire) word, thank you very much. When she gets like that about vampires right in Stefan's face, I wonder if he stands there thinking she's a bigot. Whatever. Thanks to Katherine and an accidental assist from Bonnie and Damon, Caroline is now a vampire. So there's going to be a plethora of V and D, no matter what Elena wants. Poor thing needs a life condom.

Since Caroline starts to transition while alone in the hospital, she feeds on a blood bag like it's a Capri Sun, but does not manage to escape the ensuing disgust and guilt. No matter your meal plan, hospital food sucks. Her hunger is overpowering, though, so eventually she adds some fresh, hot nurse juice to her diet and learns the art of compulsion all by her lonesome. When Matt comes to visit, she pulls back from him, because cheerleaders can't binge on Pudding Pops without blowing up like pompoms. Eventually, she compels her nurse to release her from the hospital and finds the gang at the High School Carnival -- which is not a Founders-related event. Hooray! Damon knows what she is and that she must be staked, but he may just think that because she delivers Katherine's clichéd "Game on," message, knocks him on his fine ass and tells him he sucks. Elena firmly opposes Damon's plan (and even puts herself between Damon's stake and Care Bear) with a reluctant Stefan's help, and Bonnie blames everything, ever, on Damon and tries to kill him. With fire! Elena runs through the flames to plead with Bonnie for his life, even though he just snapped Jeremy's neck last week. See? She has no feelings for him at all. Except for all the hatred, obvo.

Meanwhile Mason "Brick House" Lockwood tries to help his nephew Tyler tame his inner wolf. Damon can't forget that the late, great Mayor Lockwood was disabled by the Gilbert Gizmo, yet not affected by vervain, so he and an unwilling Stefan smoke out the smoking hotties to determine what they are and why they're so pretty strong. Damon compels a carnival worker, Carter, to pick at fight with Tyler and leaves Stefan to observe from the bushes as Brick House leaps over cars to save his nephew. I don't think Stefan sees Brick's eyes go lupine, but Tyler doesn't miss it. Carter, by the way, survives the fight only to be eaten by an apologetic but famished Caroline. Later on, at the Lockwood estate, Tyler finds the moonstone Brick House has been looking for and keeps it to himself.

Stefan is a busy boy this week. In addition to his Damon-herding duties, he tries to help Caroline through her transition and tutors Jeremy in vampire defense strategies -- even giving him some liquified vervain, which the Germ promptly uses to spoil the Salvatores' liquor. Oh the boozemanity! He intends to disable Damon and stake him, but once he gets a look at those blue eyes, he can't go through with his evil scheme. What?

It all ends with Stefan sneaking Elena out for some middle-of-the-night macking at the closed carnival. He Edward Cullens her to the top of the ferris wheel and they make out, even as they face the fact that normal is so not their watchword. But wait, there's even more romance. Matt, who knows something is up with Caroline, is so afraid he's going to lose her that he confesses he's in love with her. She uses her new Stefan-taught breathing to restrain the beast within. Ain't love grand?

I'll be back ASAP with the full weecap. In the meantime, join us in our forum!

Below, see what vloggers Val and Beth think of vampires who prefer high school girls, in TV is the Answer.

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