I'm at 3000 words and only 20 minutes into the episode, so I'm going to collapse some of this and plagiarize my recaplet, for the Sage/Damon/Rebekah sexcapades. We're back at Mossy Manse. Sage has compelled a piano player to be dinner and entertainment. Insecure, lonely Rebekah shows up, even though she hates Damon and Sage. This is when I want to choke Rebekah. After Damon does some cheesy sexy dancing with Sage, he again turns his wiles on the thousand year-old cheerleader, who's feeding on the piano player. Damon joins her for a snack, and I'm pretty sure they drain their victim dry, but his death doesn't even reach the level of being a plot point. This is when I want to choke Damon. Anyhow, he gets Rebekah in bed and wears her out. Once she's sleeping, Sage enters the room -- and Rebekah's mind. She sucks out the Son of White Oak conversation between Becky and Klaus. When Damon joins Sage in his covet-worthy shower, she kisses him and imparts the memory of the conversation to Damon's mind.
Sidebar: I'm usually all in favor of Dancing Damon and nearly nekkid Damon, but it makes me cringe, this week. I'd blame the cheesiness of it, but heck, I cover Ringer, so really, my cheese-tolerance has probably tripled during this television season. I hope you all enjoyed it, but it made me feel pandered to.
Bonnie finds Abby outside, and brings her a blood bag to help stave off the cravings. She explains that episodes like the one Abby just had are a normal occurrence during transition. Abby can't believe she hurt Jamie. She wants to leave before she hurts Jamie again -- or Bonnie. Bonnie says the only way Abby can hurt her is to leave. She begs her "mother" not to give up -- again, and promises they can make it work. Caroline comes out and reports that she healed Jamie with her blood. Now she needs a favor.
At Gilbert Gables, Alaric gives Elena a list of all his bank accounts, passwords, family contact information, etc., in case something happens to him. Elena tells him not to think like that, but he wants to makes sure she and Jeremy will be okay. Elena assures him they're all going to be fine.
Caroline calls Elena and says that Abby thinks Bonnie can reverse the protect-o ring's damage. The same sort of thing happens with witches who become obsessed with dark magic. Elena sighs with relief. Bonnie takes the phone and in the first time she's talked to Elena since Damon vamped Abby, she says she needs a personal effect of Alaric's -- something he wore before he started wearing the protect-o ring. Elena takes the opportunity to apologize to Bonnie for everything and to thank her for doing the spell, but Bonnie's not ready to engage in that conversation, so she just tells Elena to be ready to do the spell when Bonnie gets back to town. After the call, Elena tells Alaric what they need. He proposes his wedding ring, which is at the loft. Elena's a bit taken aback. I guess that's because Ric was married to her birth mother, which is a nice touch. Alaric's going to get the wedding ring from his loft, but Mere says it's best if he stays back at Gilbert Gables with her.