Recapper: Decidedly not, Damon. I mean if Klaus, Elijah and siblings are truly the "Original" vampires, they're your ancestors, in the supernatural sense. Assuming "Original" isn't another lie, like the Curse of the Sun and the Moon, that is.
Klaus and Elijah: *Whistling*
Recapper: A fat lot of help you two are. So, Stefan, Damon, one of the "Originals" turned a human, who turned a human, who turned a human and so on, for about 850 years, until you two were turned. Now, to make matters even more interesting, the vampire who turned you, that is -- Katherine, is also a doppelganger of Tatia. Tatia was an ingredient in creating your race. Her doppelganger then turned you, personally. No wonder you're both so in love with Elena (and were with Katherine). It's your double destiny. And? I think it's Elena's destiny to love you both, too.
Bonnie (over speaker phone): That's all well and good, but why are you interrupting my spell...
Damon: Um, Bon, we're on speakerphone, at Klaus Haus.
Bonnie: Oh, right. Um, so um...why have you interrupted my spell--spell-spelling bee drills, to tell me all this?
Recapper: Well, you know how you're sick of doing spells for Elena (the doppelganger) to help her deal with all this vampire crap?
Bonnie: Yeah. F.M.L.
Recapper: You're a witch. Whether or not Eloise Hawking is truly the "Original" witch, she's a witch. She is of your supernatural race, and if she's the Original witch, she's your ancestor in a supernatural sense. She started this whole mess, and used Elena's ancestor to start it. Your supernatural race is all about the balance of nature and whatnot. One of your own created this disaster. That's why you're always being drawn into cleaning it up. You're destined for this, too.
Bonnie: Oh, so F.M.L. and my destiny? I get what you're saying, but I've got to go.
Meanwhile, back in the No Vampires Allowed cave chamber...
Bonnie and Abby: *Chant In Latin*
Magical Forces: *Flop*
Bonnie: You know, you suck so much, that it was more fun to pretend you were dead.
Abby: What can I do to prove how sorry I am?
Bonnie: How about some fricking magic, Witch.
Bonnie and Abby: *Resume Chanting*
Magical Forces: *Candles Flare*
Bonnie: Since that seems to have almost worked, I'm going to go to an outer chamber where there's better reception, and call Damon, rather than power through the spell again. If you need me, won't that just be poetic justice. SUCK IT, MOM!