Bonnie's Karaoke Date: Ben has paid the check and asks Bonnie what she'd like to do now. She grabs his face and lays a big kiss on him, but the sound fx guys let us know he gives her the heebie jeebies. When he asks what's wrong, Bonnie lies, "Nothing," but we don't believe her -- neither does Ben. She does her best to cover though, and says she should have waited until the end of the night to kiss him. When she adds that she's tired, Ben assumes she wants to go, but she suggests they stay, load up on coffee and then go out and do something crazy. When Ben asks, "Like what?" Bonnie flirts at him: "Like anything." She then takes off her coat and says she's headed to the rest room. She walks off and to the (our) right, but when she's confident that Ben's not looking, she reverses direction. I have no idea where she intended to go or why she didn't just frigging call Elena and I'm a little annoyed, so we'll move right along. As she goes wherever, Ben vamps out, Stealth-Salvatores her, covers her mouth, and drags her off.
Grave: Stefan digs as Elena stands around holding a shovel, a flashlight, and looking cute. Utterly tone-deaf tonight, she sighs and says, "Not many girls can say they've done this." Stefan must be completely whipped, because he just smiles sadly and gets back to his digging. Almost immediately, he scrapes against the casket lid. He clears it off and starts to open it, when Elena asks, "Is that it?" No, Elena. It's the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop. Stefan's more gracious than I. He opens the lid without a word to reveal his father's skeleton. He removes the grimoire from his hands (hand bones?) and closes the lid.
The grimoire is encased in wax. Stefan cuts it off and opens the book. And just as he does, Damon's voice rings out through the black night. "Well, what do you know? This is an interesting turn of events." After a commercial break, Stefan doesn't bother to lie or otherwise cover, like a sane person might do. Oh, no. He just says, "I couldn't let you bring her back. I'm sorry." Damon's sorry that he thought for even a second that he could count on his own brother. Stefan points out that the only reason Damon could be there is that he found the journal and decided to do everything by himself. Damon's all: no dur. "The only one I can count on is me! You made sure of that, many years ago, Stefan." He looks from his brother to the woman who is a dead ringer for his lover. "But you... You had me fooled." Elena did? Really, Damon? I thought she totally sucked at lying. Damon doesn't want to get into that, now. Instead, he asks, "What are we going to do, now -- because if you try to destroy that -- I will rip her heart out." Stefan, forgetting who he's dealing with, says, "You won't kill her." Damon Stealth-Salvatores his way to Elena's side and says, "I can do one better." He opens a vein and forces Elena to drink from his wrist. Gag. "Give me the book, Stefan, or I'm stabbing her neck, and you and I will have a vampire girlfriend." Hello? Does Elena not get any say in this? Okay, she and Damon do have mad chemistry and if she was suddenly footloose and moral-free, she'd probably be glad to do them both, but still -- presumptuous, much? Damon demands the book. Stefan insists on getting Elena back first, because an object for an object, right? That's totally in the Bible. When Damon says he can't trust that Stefan will give the book back to him, Stefan says, "You just did the one thing that ensures that I will." Damon buries his face in Elena's hair in a gesture that some people find sweet and others find creepy. Honestly, I think it's both. Finally, and with much tension, they make the exchange. Stefan caresses
his object Elena, and then quickly takes her from that place, leaving Damon alone with the book and his memories. I hope he doesn't find his magical toadstool, because it's already taking every bit of strength I have not to woobify him.