Stefan wakes with a start in his bed at Mossy Manse. As he gasps for unnecessary breath, his brother Damon says, "Bad dream? Do you know how easy it was to get in your head just now? You really need some human blood. It might even the playing field.... Football reference! Too soon?" Ahahahaha. Damon, you card, it's never too soon to joke about All-Trades Tanner. Stefan gets up and fast-forwards himself to his desk, picks up a silver letter opener, and hurls it at Damon. He hits him, but misses his heart. Damon glances down at it as though it were a common pin, pulls it out, and waves the bloody, makeshift weapon around, while he informs his brother that he's framed a mountain lion for the death of All-Trades Tanner and all the other recent victims of the "wild animal attacks." MYTHOLOGY MOMENT: Okay, the letter opener doesn't kill Damon, but the way Stefan hurled it, I suspect we may learn that silver kills these vampires. Anyhow, Damon pauses for effect, because he's always pausing for effect, and then mimes laying out newspaper headlines, as he announces: "Deadly Beast Captured. All's Well In Mystic Falls." Damon is covering his tracks because he'll be staying in town to have even more fun with Stefan and Elena. Yippee! When Stefan reminds Damon he can't touch Elena now, Damon replies, "Well, the Vervain keeps me out of her head, but maybe that's not my target." Dirty. "Believe it or not, Stefan, some girls don't need my persuasion. Some girls just can't resist my good looks, my style, and my charm -- my unflinching ability to listen to Taylor Swift." Even though Co-Executive Producer Julie Plec insists that is not a Swift jab, I hope it was filmed before the VMAs.
Episode Report CardCindy McLennan: A | 1732 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT