Welcome back, everyone. I'm so glad our show is back. I'm glad to be back at work, too! An awful lot happens in the Season 4 premiere of The Vampire Diaries, to some extent -- too much happens. Some scenes and plot points are overly telescoped, but still, we get an hour (well, 42 minutes) of exciting, compelling TV, so I'm going to dive right in. You ready? Okay!
There's a new opening montage. It begins with Stefan narrating, but soon Elena, Damon, Bonnie, Klaus, Liz and more take the mic. It's cheesy, but in a fun way, like the fog and the crow of yore. I'll break it down just this once.
STEFAN (over shot of him jumping off the Mossy Manse roof): Mystic Falls. I was born here. This is my home.
DAMON (driving his baby blue convertible): And mine.
ELENA (writing in her diary): And mine.
STEFAN (over shots of the Originals' North American village; 1912 Damon): For centuries, supernatural creatures have lived among us.
ELENA (over shots of modern game-face Damon with a bloody mouth; a wolf; Katherine, Elena and Stefan in Mossy Manse): There are vampires, werewolves, doppelgängers...
BONNIE (stopping Jeremy's heart): ...witches...
KLAUS (in game face): ...and even hybrids.
LIZ (opening the door to Matt carrying Caroline in): There are those who protect them.
ALARIC (as Vamparic, from on-screen Season 3 lines, over shots of himself; bloody-mouthed Caroline; Carol; transitioning-Tyler): "The Sheriff has a vampire for a daughter, and our lovely Mayor -- a son, who is half vampire, half werewolf."
JEREMY (over shots of Vamparic staking desiccated Klaus; desi-Klaus opening his eyes): And those who want them dead.
ELENA (over a shot of Elena, Caroline, and Bonnie hugging): They're our friends...
STEFAN (over a shot of him trying to stake Klaus): ...our enemies...
ELENA (over shots of Elena making out with Damon, and then Stefan): ...the ones we love...
STEFAN (over shots of the gang burying Jenna; Damon cradling Vamparic as he dies): ...the ones we've lost.
ELENA (in a clip from the Season 3 finale bridge accident): "Matt look out!" (Cut to Rebekah standing in the road. Matt slams on the brakes. His truck swerves and goes right over the bridge).
ELENA (Elena and Matt, trapped underwater, Stefan swims to the rescue, Elena insists he save Matt): And then there's me. I'm human. (Elena dies. Cut to her lying in the morgue.) At least I was. (She gasps and sits up. Fade to black.)