Meanwhile, back on the ranch... Minions march into the barn to hang more vervain. Stefan makes eyes at Rebekah, who nods back in agreement. Minion 1 tells Minion 2, "I've got this," bring the other one in. Rebekah appeals to Minion 1. "Excuse me. Oh, sir." She tells him how wealthy her family is. She is willing to buy her freedom. Minion 1 tells her he'd much rather watch her die. Rebekah roars at him and pushes him across to Stefan, who grabs him, possibly breaks his neck, and definitely bangs the guy's head against the bars until our minion collapses in a pool of his own blood. Stefan calls out to Elena. She opens her eyes and sees the blood, and even though the unconscious minion's hand seems within her grasp, she reaches past it (with so much struggle I almost fall asleep), dips her fingers in the less handy puddle of blood, and licks them.
Outside, both Damon and Matt are still down on the ground when two armed minions approach. They get on either side of Damon and kick him. He plays possum for a second then jumps to his feet and overtakes them both, staking at least one of these humans with his own rifle. Damon then turns to Matt, who is struggling to get up, and kicks him in the face.
Damon Damon Damon Damon Damon Damon Damon Damon Damon Damon Damon Damon Damon Damon Damon Damon Matt: "Go ahead and kill me. You can't possibly hate me more than I hate myself." Damon: "Oh yes I can." He puts his foot on Matt's throat. "It should have been you." Before I leap through the screen and kill Damon, myself, it's Vamp Elena to the rescue. In full game face, she charges at Damon and knocks him away from Matt. "LEAVE HIM ALONE!" How did she get out of her cell, when neither Stefan nor Rebekah could get out, and they're much older and therefore more powerful than this baby vamp? Pshaw. What show are you watching, thinking you're going to get that sort of information? Conversely, if they did get out by reaching bleeding/dead minion's keys, why didn't they, or at least Stefan, come outside with Elena? Again I say, pshaw, what show are you watching? Blah. Commercial.
Matt stumbles into the barn, where he finds Stefan, who is out of his cell, but just wandering around. Okee dokee. More blah. When Matt collapses, it sort of looks and sounds like Stefan offers Matt his wrist, to get some healing vampire blood, but when Matt sits up, his lips are bone dry, so I'm not sure what that was supposed to be. Matt struggles away from Stefan. "Just stop. Stop saving me." Stefan: "What the hell is your problem?" Matt: "You want me to say thank you? Because honestly, I wish you'd just let me drown." Stefan: "You think you were my first choice?" Matt: "Elena's a vampire because of me. I have to live with that every day for the rest of my life." Stefan: "No no no no. You don't have to live with that, you get to live with that -- because Elena put your life before her own. So every morning you get out of bed, you sure as hell had better earn it."