Yesterday, I tweeted to Julie Plec and Kevin Williamson that I hope they're giving Nina Dobrev a Christmas vacation on a private island. If only I could turn back time. I mean... how embarrassing! Who says stuff like that to TV writers? Had I any pride, any sense of decorum, I never would have done that. I should have said: an all expenses-paid Christmas vacation, amirite?
How many plots in "Katerina" feature Ms. Dobrev? Let's see: she plays the human Katerina Petrova, giving birth while crying and pleading in fricking Bulgarian. She plays Katerina trying to pass as a Brit, before finally killing herself to initiate her transition into a vampire. She plays modern-day Katerina/Katherine, mouldering away in ye olde tomb. And? She plays our girl, Elena Gilbert (opposite her Katherine), who is already a deliciously and fully conceived character. As much as I ooh and ah over this show's eye-candy of the male variety, it's Elena's story that grabs me week after week. With all apologies to Lucia, Cleolinda Jones and probably a thousand other women I've met online in the past decade or so, I am a heroine addict, and Ms. Dobrev gives her all -- and three other people's all, too -- to her roles, every week.
"Katerina" is all about Katherine's backstory, including how she gave birth to an illegitimate daughter back in 1490 and how she turned to vampirism to disqualify herself from serving as the Petrova doppelganger, and escaping the much-teased but still mysterious original Original vampire: Satan Klaus. We get much of this, because after learning more from Rose and the beautiful Brothers Salvatore about old Satan Klaus, who wants our girl for a sun beam curse-breaking sacrifice, Elena marches down to ye olde tomb for a family reunion -- with the ancestor who spawned her line 520 years prior. We learn all sorts of mythology I'll hit in the full weecap, and totally forget that Katherine and Elena aren't played by two equally accomplished, talented and beautiful twin sisters (or possibly triplets).
Elsewhere, Caroline and Stefan continue to bond. Bonnie and Jeremy continue to bond, at least until a new Baby Manwitch, Luka, frigs things up. (Oh and his Daddy Manwitch is working for the not-dead, undead Elijah, who of course works for Satan Klaus.) And Rose and Damon start to bond, with Damon's shirt off. (C'mon, you know I wouldn't leave that out.)
I'm throwing up my A+ grade early this week, and suggest you do the same. Grade the episode at the top of the page now, and grade it when you come back to read the weecap too, which I'll put up, ASAP. Until then, please join us on the boards where we're hiding Damon's shirt in a sealed tomb.
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Want more? The full recap starts right below!
Previously on The Vampire Diaries...HEY! The Previouslies changed. Hurrah. No more "for over a century." No more "I have to know her." No more, "She's a dead ringer for Katherine." Are you giddy, babies? I'm a little giddy.
Now: Oh darn it, Show. I hate when you open with a flashback, when I want to start with a Now. Fine. Be that way....
Bulgaria, 1490: Katherine Pierce, is still human. She's still Katerina Petrova -- an unwed mother who is giving birth in her family home. When her daughter is born, Katerina begs to hold her, but her stern father comes in the room, grabs the baby from Mama Petrova, berates Katerina for disgracing the family, and whisks the child away. Mama Petrova holds Katerina as she sobs and pleads to see her baby. Nina Dobrev (who started life as Nina Dobreva, in Sofia, Bulgaria) gives great Bulgarian, and this is too tragic to make light of. Next paragraph...
Mossy Manse: Elena has been summoned by Stefan. He, Damon and Rose give Elena the lowdown on the original Original: Klaus, who makes Elijah look like the Easter Bunny, so Satan Klaus it is! Satan Klaus is the oldest known vampire in the history of time, so you can imagine how thrilled Elena is that he's coming after her. Damon and Stefan try to soft-pedal the news, but Rose refuses to play along. Satan Klaus is one BAMF, and our girl best beware. Elena tries to shake it off, and announces she's going to school. Stefan says he'll go with her, but things are still tense between them. She'll go on her own, thanks. Ouch. After Elena is gone, Damon cracks to Rose that Elena is in denial. Stefan snaps at him. "Shut up, Damon." Heh.
Mystic Falls High School; Exterior: Bonnie drops her books getting out of the car, and it's Jeremy to the rescue. Oh man, they're cute together. Jeremy invites Bonnie to play pool at the Grill after school. She's a little taken aback by it, but then she gets a good look at him and accepts. Hooray. Seconds later, a new African-American male student bursts on the scene, introduces himself, "My name is Luka." No one asks him if he lives on the second floor, which is a missed opportunity if you ask me. When Luka needs directions to the office, Jeremy gives them to him, while Bonnie gives him her prettiest smile. Bonnie! Now cut that out. You've got some flirting (smooching) to do with the Germ.
Forest: Elena is ditching school. She's headed to ye olde tomb to talk to Katherine! Caroline accompanies her, so she can pull open the heavy door. Too bad she didn't use some of that vampire strength to tote the heavy bag Elena's struggling to carry. Care Bear doesn't want to lie to Stefan about what Elena is doing, or distract him for Elena, but Elena plays the friend card, and the you-kept-me-busy-for-Katherine card, so Caroline promises to cover for her. She reminds Elena that Katherine is hardly a bulwark of truth, so Elena might not get much out of her, but Elena says she needs to do this.
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