Vampire Diaries
My Brother's Keeper

Episode Report Card
Cindy McLennan: C+ | 9 USERS: B
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The Real Slim Shady

The girls are interrupted by Professor Shane, who is at the pageant to interview contestants. When Elena remembers his name from her trip to Whitmore College, Shane says, "Yeah, that's right. Professor by day. Pageant judge by other day. In spite of being absurdly unqualified, I'm apparently awarding a scholarship." Okay, why is a college professor absurdly unqualified when it comes to scholarship awards? That doesn't even make sense, Show. I mean sure, I can buy that he's never interviewed pageant contestants before, but he's certainly talked to older teens, and knows how to read an academic transcript, right? Ugh. Don't try so hard to make him quippy. Quippiness comes when it's in the mood. When Caroline directs him to the Lockwood parlor, Shane says, "All right, I'll just follow the scent of hairspray and world domination." See, that's the way you do it.

Once they're alone again, Elena tells Caroline that Shane is the one who told Damon how to break the Hunter's Curse. Caroline tells Elena he's got Bonnie so obsessed with practicing magic again, that she's bailed on pageant prep. I don't even think Bonnie was in the pageant last year, was she? Maybe Bonnie bailed, because it's stupid, and feels no responsibility to help she's not from a founding family, since the historical racism in this town is rivaled only by its vampire infestation. Elena and Caroline agree that it's creepy Shane is now judging the pageant, because it so very much is.

On the other side of the house, Matt and Jeremy are unloading booze from Matt's new pickup truck, because what's a high school beauty pageant, without liquor. Oh, this Show. Matt: "So, your sister is making me be her date. Think I'll have to do that weird dance thing?" Oh Pudding Pop, you know I love you like...pudding, but if you only see it as a "weird dance thing" then I'm starting to understand why you're still alone.

Jeremy reassures Matt that only the contestants have to do the weird dance thing, and confirms that he's April's escort. "She needed a date, and apparently you were taken." When Matt struggles to unload a keg from the truck bed, Jeremy hops up and shows off his newfound strength. He picks up two kegs, one in each hand, and jumps down to the ground. Matt is more disturbed than impressed, and Jeremy's explanation that his strength comes from his newly woken hunter-osity, does little to dispel Matt's fears. He reminds Jeremy that a byproduct of his energy is an increasing desire to kill vampires. Since he lives with one, perhaps he should talk to someone about what's going on with him. Jeremy pooh-poohs this. "I would never hurt my sister. I'll be fine." Matt grimaces as he watches Jeremy walk off.

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Vampire Diaries

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