Vampire Diaries
She's Come Undone

Episode Report Card
Cindy McLennan: A+ | 42 USERS: D-
YOU GRADE IT
Tryin' To Get Her Feeling Again

Outside. It's dark, now. Caroline's phone rings. She finally wakes. There's no stake in her gut, and her shirt looks okay, so I guess even the staking was a mirage, which makes me wonder how and why she passed out. Apparently Silas can do everything, which makes him the most boring villain ever to have twirled a mustache. Caroline grabs her phone and runs back toward Mossy Manse. Matt pops out of nowhere, but he's not Matt; he's Silas. He throttles Caroline and again orders her to get him Bonnie, or he'll kill someone, and maybe he'll start with Caroline's mother. Caroline runs to the manse. She's intercepted by Klaus, who is also Silas. He again demands she produce Bonnie, threatens to kill the person Caroline most loves, then tosses her down an outside staircase.

Caroline runs to her product placement. As she gets in the driver's seat, she calls Liz and orders her to go home and lock all the doors, and not to let anyone in, even Care (because after all, she has a key). What she doesn't do is take five seconds to say, "There's a monster who can impersonate everyone, Mom. He can read minds too, so do what I say." I'm not going to continue to recap the product placement, unless Ford pays me. Suffice it to say Silas is behind Caroline's car, then next to it. When she sees his true face, she speeds off. We cut to the...

Mossy Manse basement. Katherine opens the safe, tells Elena she looks awful and then forcefully whips her out of the safe. Elena asks what Katherine's doing there. Kiki says, "Your boyfriends invited me." I am deluding myself into thinking that's a shout-out. Katherine says the boys want to know if Elena still has a heart, then to remind us that that is Season Gore, every bit as much as it's been Season Cure Bore, she plunges her hand into Elena's chest and grabs her heart. At least Katherine has some manners. When she pulls her hand back out, she manages to wipe her bloody hand. I commend you for that, Kiki. You should really give this girl some etiquette lessons.

Katherine asks Elena what she said to Elijah, back in "American Gothic." Elena realizes this means Elijah has dumped Katherine. Katherine says, "Tell me what you said to turn him against me, or I will feed you your own eyeballs." I am so glad I have this bucket next to me. Elena says she didn't have to say anything. "Look at you. Self-obsessed egomaniac. On the run for five centuries. What good would you be to anyone? You're the definition of damaged goods. No wonder Elijah left you."

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Vampire Diaries

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