Gilbert Gables. Elijah blathers about ISoWOs, too. Once it's been disarmed, the Mikaelsons will scatter and take Desikklaus with them. Alaric will, presumably, follow. The Fellowship of the Falls can live in peace. Stefan and Elena don't trust Elijah, mostly because he's screwed them over more often than not. Elena doesn't want Desikklaus undesiccated, obvo. Elijah promises that he will leave Desikklaus desiccated until Elena and even her future children have died off. Then he does the best thing ever. He fiddles with the table setting, until it's properly aligned and says, "Perhaps that will finally teach him some manners?" No, really. It's just adorable. Look here. Gosh, I want the Elijah show.

As co-captain of Team Human, Matt is immune to Elijah's not inconsiderable charms. "Why should she trust you? All you've done is screw her over." Elijah: "And for that, I'm deeply ashamed. But know this: she could have been dead the instant I walked through that door tonight. So, Elena, I leave it to you to make the decision whether to trust me or not." Suddenly, Damon's disembodied voice chimes in. "Not! Hello! Did that concussion give you brain damage?" Ha! He's on speaker phone, but at first I had this image of Damon suddenly being able to sense the stupid and push his thoughts to wherever they're most needed, so I'm going to keep pretending that is what's happening in this scene. Disembodied Damon continues: "His lunatic siblings will kill you the first chance they get." Elijah swears that Rebekah and Kol will honor the terms; return Desikklaus and Elena will come to no harm. "Do we have a deal?" Disembodied Damon: "No! No, no, no, no. Did I mention no?!" Stefan shakes his head and tells Elena it's up to her. Disembodied Damon: "Oh, come on!" Elena asks Elijah why he wants Desikklaus. Elijah says, "He's my brother. We remain together." Our Lady of Compassionate Yet Questionable Judgment makes her decision. "We have a deal." Before Damon can will himself through the phone lines and strangle everyone at Gilbert Gables, we cut to...