Anyhow, Stefan exposits that since Germ didn't gobble down enough pain killers to actually end his life, Anna's blood healed him of the overdose. Jeremy's disappointment in his persistent humanity horrifies Elena and angers Stefan. After the Germ reveals that Anna is dead, Stefan roughs him up a little (including a keen little face slap), but only in order to point out that Anna's blood is leaving his system with every passing moment. If he tries to turn himself again, he may just die, instead. When Elena must depart for the hospital, Stefan offers to remain at Gilbert Gables with the Germ, who comes over all indignant: "I don't need a babysitter." Wah. Elena raises her eyebrows at her suicidal/vamp-wannabe sibling. "Yes. You do." So say we all.

Hospital: Matt is keeping vigil in a lonely hallway, while Caroline fights for her life in surgery. When Bonnie arrives and asks what happened, Matt explains that as Tyler was driving them home he complained about a noise only he could hear, fell prey to an insta-migraine, and lost control of the car. Bonnie looks stricken as it dawns on her that her Gilbert Gizmo disarming charade is to blame for Caroline's critical condition. And I love you Bon, but you deserve that leaden lump you're feeling in your tiny tummy.

Meanwhile, Damon finds Liz "She's the Sheriff" Forbes in another hallway and asks after Caroline. Voice wavering, she asks for Damon's help and tells him about Mayor Lockwood's death (because she doesn't know Damon witnessed the event). He plays dumb and asks if the Mayor was a vampire. Liz says he couldn't have been, and she knows Carol "Mama Mulva" Lockwood is going to want answers, but Liz can't deal unless and until Caroline is okay. When she dissolves into tears, Damon comforts her in his arms, inspiring the audience to master the skill of crying on cue. Sniff.