Veronica Mars
Ahoy, Mateys!

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: B+ | 3 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
See What Happens When You Don't Take Backup?

In what looks like study hall, Veronica gets a call. She's too late in remembering to answer "Radio Broadcast Alliance," resulting in a hang-up, but she looks at the call log and smiles...

...into VMVO telling us that, one reverse phone book later, she's got the caller's address, which we see is on "Crescent Street." Veronica knocks on the door of the house in question, and a girl named "Roxie" -- who Marcos slammed in a broadcast Veronica listened to earlier, and who also recognizes Veronica -- answers. Veronica accuses Roxie of having a relationship with Marcos, but she's confused until her brother, who's the kid from the computer class who told Veronica that no one really knew Marcos, arrives home with food for them. So I guess that if no one really knew Marcos, it wasn't totally for a lack of trying. Seeing Veronica, the brother (Ryan) tries to blow by Veronica into the house, but Veronica easily stops him...

...and then they're out chatting on the hood of Ryan's car. Ryan says that he listened to the show religiously, and he was pretty much in love with Marcos's radio persona. Then Marcos and Butters (and he totally calls Vincent "Butters" too, which is awesome) signed out a particular microphone from school that Ryan heard used on the show, so he figured out it was them. That's good detective work, there, Veronica -- maybe Ryan can be your new sidekick! Keith would totally approve of the lack of potential romance, and Ryan won't give you any competition for guys until he takes the bowl out of his haircut equation! Veronica asks if Ryan and Marcos were a couple, and Ryan explains that he wanted that, but that while they were friends, Marcos was sexually on the fence: "I kept trying to subtly push him over." He says that one time, he was giving Marcos a back rub, and Marcos's parents came home: "For some reason, seeing their shirtless son with a boy straddling him was...upsetting." Well, I sympathize, but I have to opine that on top of the position in which you happened to be caught, whatever was going on in your crotch area is unlikely to have qualified as "subtle." Anyway, Marcos's parents shipped him off to that horrible camp and made him promise never to see Ryan again. Also, he was forced to do "normal" things, like go on field trips to baseball games. Just another illustration of why normal should never be the watchword. Ryan bitterly says that Marcos is dead because he was desperate to win back his parents' approval. Veronica sternly says that Marcos's parents lost their son, and that the pranks really hurt them. Ryan: "Good. That was the idea." Veronica reacts like she's surprised. Honey, vengeful queens have to get their start somewhere. And as long as we're making Star Wars references, the bitch is strong in this one.

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Veronica Mars

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