Veronica Mars
Veronica Mars

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: A+ | 1361 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Pocket Rockets

Jake storms back into the party, Veronica slowly following. As Duncan approaches Veronica, Jake grabs his wife and asks just what the hell she did. Mommie Sneerest asks what he means, but he positively manhandles her out of the room over her protests. Oh, my. Now that is interesting. And can anyone describe the car ride home? Un! Comfortable! Haaron thinks this means it's time for a drink. Well, it is o'clock. Duncan, looking perturbed, disappears, as Veronica tries to take in what she just saw.

Lynn rings a bell to get everyone's attention. She informs everyone that if they'll follow the Santas outside, she has a special surprise for them. Speaking of which, Keith has made his way into the party. Haaron says he'll get his jacket. There are a bunch of people in old-time costume set up to carol. Lynn grabs Haaron, who's talking to a genial-looking Ho Peep. They start to head outside, but they're interrupted by the Carver, whom Haaron apparently slept with and told he loved. Well, sure, but a lot of people's affirmations are suspect when made with a carving knife at the throat. Keith sees what's going on and starts toward the scene. Haaron denies knowing the Carver, which is all the reason she needs to stab him nice and good right then and there. The ensuing slow-motion shots are interspersed with normal-time shots of the carolers, giving the whole scene a glitzy, surreal feeling that totally worked for me, although many of the forum posters don't share that opinion. Keith tackles the Carver. Haaron cringes in pain as Ho Peep looks on in horror. Logan looks distraught as his mother yells for someone to call an ambulance. The weapon -- a screwdriver, or possibly an awl -- lies on the floor. Logan calls on his cell. Haaron loses consciousness. Veronica looks distraught as well. Outside, people applaud the carolers, having no idea what just transpired mere yards away. As we pull back from the cheesy fake snow (being blown into the air by guys with blowers on platforms, heh) and unwary happy people outside, VMVO asks: "What was I thinking? Christmas in Neptune is, was, and always will be about the trappings. The lights and the tinsel they use to cover up the sordidness, the corruption. No, Veronica, there is no Santa Claus." And that's the sentiment that was more appropriate for the holidays than the episode they yanked. Merry Christmas!

Seriously, awesome episode, and thanks for reading. Have a great holiday season, and I'll see you back here in 2005!

Veronica Mars

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