Wallace enters the Fennel home, apparently right after the point at which we left off last time. He's looking kind of upset, as will happen when you discover that you need a new transmission, and also that your dad is someone totally different than you thought. Alicia serves dinner as she says she was just about to come out to get Wallace, and I'm sure she'll be regretting that she didn't make something microwavable. Wallace drops the Nathan Woods bomb, and asks who was the man they buried in Cleveland (that's two questions answered, right there). Alicia tells him that was his dad, but Wallace isn't trying to hear that. He sits down on the couch for comfort, which is something I can get behind. Alicia approaches him deliberately and tells him that she and Woods got married when she was twenty-one, and that it's true that he was a narcotics detective, but that he went deep undercover on a big case, and started using drugs and stashing heroin and guns in their house. Well, Alicia, some women find that attractive. But maybe it's just when Kiefer does it. Alicia sits down and puts her arm around Wallace, and tells him that his real father is Hank Fennel. She goes to get Wallace's birth certificate from the cabinet in which Keith poked around last episode, but it isn't there. Alicia grits that she knows where it is; giving her a lightning rod for her anger here doesn't seem like the best idea for Keith's health. Not to mention the chances of his balls being any color but blue for quite some time to come. Alicia emotionally tells Wallace that Hank signed his name on Wallace's birth certificate the day he asked Alicia to marry him, which I guess means he formally adopted Wallace: "And that is who your father was. That's who he still is." Um, I hate to interrupt a nice moment here, but.... Anyway, Alicia hugs Wallace, but he still looks upset. Great work by both players here.
Homeroom. Veronica comes in and takes her seat next to Wallace, who looks like Neptune just dropped its basketball program. Veronica sees his expression and asks if he's "got a sweet love hangover and you don't need no cure?" I think my guess was a little closer in tone. The homeroom teacher, who's the same guy from "M.A.D.," announces that Homecoming is upon them, and Veronica sighs, "Much like the plague." By the way, if you'd like to know three things about the actor who plays the homeroom teacher, according to his IMDbprofile, he is lactose-intolerant, went to Yale, and was on the U.S. World Team for fencing. That makes me want to see an episode wherein the teacher exchanges pithy witticisms with the evil CEO of the American Dairy Association during a duel. The teacher explains that each homeroom class will nominate one boy and one girl, and the top five vote-getters of each sex will comprise the "Royalty Court," from which the Homecoming King and Queen will be chosen. It would be cool if they gave everyone else different degrees of peerage. I'm not really sure what the actual duties of the Viscount of Homecoming would be, but given that the King and Queen are likely going to be 09ers, they'll be in a position to give out some pretty sweet royal grants. Veronica, noticing that Wallace is still down in the dumps, nominates him for Homecoming King. Aw.