Veronica Mars
Clash Of The Tritons

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: A+ | 6 USERS: A+
Hey, You Can Spell "Triton" Without "Trite"!

Mars Investigations. Wallace enters and smiles, "I heard it took three officers and a stun gun to haul your butt out of school." Aw. Veronica says he must have been the only one who didn't see her "walk of shame." Wow. I would have thought someone who hoofed her underwear into town in bare feet to get laughed at by the town asshole might be hesitant to bandy that particular term about. ["Plus the phrase she really meant was 'perp walk,' anyway." -- Wing Chun] She asks Wallace for a favor, which he hopes involves seducing the head cheerleader. Veronica tells him that what she needs is for him to get a fake ID, but that he should imagine he's going to score with said cheerleader. I think he imagines that most nights, and on the ones he doesn't, he has a lot of trouble falling asleep. Wallace sits down next to Veronica and breathily puts on an act of asking her to get him a fake ID. Whoa, what happened there? Because Percy Daggs's acting was like a shot of espresso. Considering I find his normal style to have the same effect as valerian root, we could really be getting somewhere. Veronica asks if he could possibly find out who else is supplying IDs, and Wallace goes to try out his growing chops on someone new.

Logan pulls into the school parking lot. He hears a couple of idiots on the radio talking about Haaron getting stabbed. Oh, are they still talking about that? It seems so long ago. Of course, the fact that it seems so long ago doesn't change the fact that WE STILL DON'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED TO HIM. Logan's lip twitches as the DJ idiots go on about his father's infidelity. Some kid knocks on the window for Logan, and Logan's voice shakes a little as he says he'll be right there. He takes another moment to compose himself. Since I've seen the next scene already, Logan, I'll give you a little advice: No rush.

And that's because, inside, tons of kids are checking out tabloid shots of Logan's parents and the Carver that are taped to Logan's locker. One of the kids is a biker we've seen before, who snarks that Logan's mom is "totally hotter" than the Carver. Ooh, bad move, biker guy. No one likes having his mom objectified, but with the LIPS, Lynn could suck a golf ball through a garden hose, so Logan's bound to be especially sensitive. The two of them scuffle, Logan getting slightly the worse of it. They quickly get broken up. Some posters were happy to see a shot of Logan's abs as he's dragged away. Personally, I don't think it gets any better than reindeer boxers and nothing else, but some people are never satisfied.

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Veronica Mars




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