School. Veronica's at her locker. A bitchy 09er girl speculates about whether Meg's face will be normal when she wakes up. Veronica slams the bint's locker closed and stomps off, causing the girl to call her a bitch. Only she went to a special school for overacting where they teach you that "bitch" has four syllables. Duncan appears and asks what's wrong. When Veronica's still too steamed to answer, Duncan tells her she's been listening to "too much Radiohead," and suggests that she try Nelly. Interesting -- I would have thought he'd recommend Robots In Disguise. Veronica emotionally asks how she should be feeling -- happy, like he is? Duncan puts up his hands and backs away with an "oh, that time of the month" look on his face. Yes, the time where YOUR EX-GIRLFRIEND IS NEARLY DEAD AND YOUR CURRENT ONE ALMOST DIED TOO AND YOU DON'T SEEM TO CARE AT ALL. Duncan really is acting like kind of a douchebag. Well, it's acting, at least.
Cook, hot baseball star extraordinaire, enters his daughter's bedroom with an overnight bag. Said daughter is Tessa Thompson, but her character's name is Jackie, if I haven't mentioned that before. Cook asks when Jackie is going to get up, and doesn't take kindly to the estimate of another forty minutes. If I had that sweet king-sized bed, I'd never get out of it, but Cook says that Jackie's not missing another day of school. Jackie: "Even if I have cramps?" She should talk to Duncan. We get alternately bitchy and stern dialogue that exposits that Jackie was living in New York with her mom, and the implication is that Jackie would rather make a macchiato than go back to New York and live with her mom, even if it meant picking the coffee beans and milking the cow herself. Cook gives her a set of car keys and tells her he'll be back in a couple of days, and that she should call if she needs anything. Jackie protests that the keys don't look German, but Cook says she'll take the Bronco, not the Porsche. Will her troubles never end?
Apparently yes, as Jackie pulls into the school parking lot in the Porsche. Heh. In study hall, some girl is prattling on about "Cervando," a PCH biker who died on the bus, and was also on the honor roll. Maybe Weevil found out about that and told him to commit hara-kiri. Some other dimwit asks if the PCHers didn't give him a hard time, and the first airhead says that they did at first, "but then they learned to respect it, because that was the kind of person that Cervando was." The kind that causes people to spew prattling nonsense about him after his death? I'm getting that. Wallace looks horribly bored and marginally offended by all of this, bless him. His expression changes, however, when Jackie enters the room, and I'll make your mental picture a lot clearer if I say that his facial expression looks like Pepe Le Pew's after that cat showed up with a white stripe painted on its back. The teacher tells Jackie that she has to go to the attendance office, and she badly delivers her line asking where it is. Wallace raises his hand as enthusiastically as the most nauseating teacher's pet in second grade, all "Ooh! Ooh!" What really sells this moment, however, is that the Babbling Bimbo now turns and gives him a look of disapproval. Hee.