Veronica Mars
Hot Dogs

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: A | 4 USERS: A+
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Woof!

…and we cut to her tracking him, as she notes that he's walking. She drives off to follow…

…and pulls into the parking lot of a warehouse-sized hardware store. She sees Solamente Un Zapato telling a couple cronies what happened. He then walks off, and Veronica gets Backup 2.0 and follows. When she rounds a corner, Solamente Un Zapato sees her and goes ballistic, which isn't so great for her, as there are well more than a dozen of his friends around. He yells in Spanish about his money as everyone crowds around. VMVO: "Oh, crap." And nary a growl from Backup 2.0. I spoke too soon before -- that trainer is so fired.

Solamente Un Zapato keeps demanding the money, but Veronica counters that he stole the dog. The guy understands that, and I'm going to assume that that's not any sort of social commentary. But I will note that Veronica's Spanish isn't quite as good as we were led to believe, which is fine. Everyone keeps babbling until VMVO tells us that it's time for the international language of…and she sounds an air horn. Hee. Veronica gets down to brass tacks, asking who stole the dog, and Solamente Un Zapato tells her that it was el hombre de los perros, or "the dog man." Thanks for clearing that up, compadre. The Dog Man drives a white van and pays the guys to return dogs, but they don't know his name. A couple guys give graphic descriptions using charades that the Dog Man likes humping busty women. At least I hope they're women -- if something more deviant got lost in translation, maybe language barriers aren't the worst thing. Veronica leaves. Hey, what about the dinero?

Wallace goes to return the little dog he got from Solamente Un Zapato. He rings the (clearly 09er) doorbell as he hopes aloud that the owner is "hot, grateful, single." I'd be interested to see what he'd do if Brad Pitt opened the door. Actually, it's not that hard: He'd do him. Who wouldn't? Anyway, the woman is late-middle-aged, and probably not hot to the tune he was hoping, but is very grateful. Go for it, Wallace. It's been fifteen episodes since Kyla Pratt guest starred.

School. In the parking lot, Veronica notices a white van, and what's more, it's got an ornament hanging from it of a busty female. Veronica looks inside…

…and later, Hans enters to find Veronica in the back. I wonder if her reputation can overcome her marked lack of a boob job. Veronica accuses him of kidnapping 09er dogs, holding them at the pound, and returning them for a big reward. Also, since he realized Mandy isn't rich, he cut his losses and got rid of Chester. The logic seems slightly flawed there -- why go to the trouble of killing the dog when you could get something for him, even if it's not much? Hans makes a 101 Dalmatians joke that's not even close to being worth repeating, and orders Veronica out, but not before she determines that he's eighteen. She's pleased as punch to reiterate, "Community soap." Hans looks like he might have seen an episode or two of Oz himself, if the terrified look on his face is any indication.

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Veronica Mars

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