Veronica Mars
Kanes And Abel's

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: B | 7 USERS: A
Hat And Mouse

Veronica catches Caz outside. She breezes that they could do this the hard way -- she asks him to stop harassing Sabrina, he denies he's doing it, she catches him, he's suspended from basketball, etc. Caz denies any involvement, saying they've had problems, but adding, "I would leap off the roof of that school if she asked me, you know." Veronica wonders if she could still get the four hundred from Sabrina if she made that happen. If that's all it's going to take, Veronica, I'll start a contribution thread right now. Anyway, Caz says he has to go, but reiterates that he didn't do it, and that he'll pound whoever did once Veronica finds him. In that case, Caz, don't jump off the roof yet. Because the enemy of my odious chinless enemy is my friend. Temporarily. VMVO: "Why is it that the Cazes of the world are forever in transit between romantic failure and the gym?" Well, I do work out a lot, so I feel qualified to say this: what the hell are you talking about?

Veronica's laptop is open to a picture of her and Lilly from the night of the dance, under the header "LILLY KANE MURDER INVESTIGATION." You'd think she'd be very careful about who she lets see this. Of course, you'd also think that Tom DeLay might be out of a job after the umpteeth scandal of his career, but that doesn't make it reality. On the desktop (!), there are folders of several suspects: Koontz, Jake, Duncan, Mommie Sneerest, Logan, Weevil, and Wiedman. VMVO babbles about preparing her case to convince Amelia that Koontz is allowing himself to be executed to make her wealthy. So you're trying to convince a girl that her psycho asshole father is giving her millions and will soon be dead. I wouldn't spend too much time on that presentation. The phone rings, and Veronica tells the caller that Keith is in a meeting...

...which he is, with a redheaded tart. And tarts have quite a shelf life, but this one is pushing its expiration date. Strawberry Tart wants Keith to set her husband up with a hooker and take pictures of him in a compromising position, which would violate their prenup, and result in a bonus for Keith. Veronica pokes her head in as Keith says that would be entrapment. Strawberry Tart says she'll take her business elsewhere, perhaps to a "Mister Vincent Vanlowe." Given her nickname, and the actor who plays Vanlowe, the thought of any "business" transpiring between them is enough to make me projectile vomit so hard I fly straight into next month. Oh, that's who killed Lilly Kane? You're not going to believe it! Keith says that if Strawberry Tart goes with Vanlowe, she'll get the "Vinnie Classic" (ew), which is Vanlowe getting the proof but taking double the money from the husband for Vanlowe to keep his trap shut. Well, I'd pay a pretty penny for that myself. Strawberry Tart leaves.

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Veronica Mars




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