Logan, sitting against the wall in the darkened room, is just drifting off to sleep when the chorus of "Escape" by Rupert Holmes kicks in, loudly. Haaaa ha ha. Logan wearily says that he'll give up the information Rider Strong wants, so Rider Strong kills the music, comes over, and leans in close. Logan: "Yes, I like piña coladas. And getting caught in the rain." You may not be aware that the opening line of that song is "I was tired of my lady." Well, now you are. Rider Strong is momentarily defeated, until he notices Horshack cowering with his back to him, and orders Horshack to his feet. Horshack gets up and turns around to reveal that he's pissed himself, and Rider Strong predictably crows in glee. Horshack tells Rider Strong that he's got sweat pants in his bag (and calls him by his first name, "Rafe," showing that they do in fact know each other), but Rider Strong is not having that.
Chez Mars. Veronica, having just gotten up, gets some water out of the refrigerator, and is then startled to see Keith's silhouette across the room. She banters with him a little, but his face starts to break, although he might have held it together if Veronica hadn't chosen to advance this spectacularly unfortunate speculation: "You've got a girl stashed somewhere, don't you?" Veronica sits on the arm of his chair and asks what's wrong. Keith cries a little as he tells her that he screwed up, and someone got hurt. Veronica puts her head on Keith's shoulder and holds his hand as she tells him that she knows exactly how he feels. Lest he think that she's just spouting a platitude, she might want to add, "No, SERIOUSLY."
Wallace happily downs some pig's knuckles. Even Logan is like, "Gross, dude." Horshack pleads that he keeps kosher, and I think this experiment is beyond, obviously, but Horshack's whiny attempts to get through to Rider Strong are starting to annoy. Rider Strong chomps some more set dressing, especially when he notices that Horshack somehow got hold of his sweat pants. Horshack won't give up his supplier, so Rider Strong puts him in solitary. Good punishment -- now that no one's watching, Horshack will probably piss himself again. Also, we got a quick cut to Wallace, so apparently he's the one who sneaked the sweat pants to Horshack.
Mac is unhappily viewing the spectacle of Parker trying on wigs with her mom. Parker says that she liked the first one better, but her severe-looking mother tells her that she should have something simple that doesn't draw attention to her. Given that the wig she's currently got on makes her look like Farrah Fawcett on crack (make your own joke here), I'd really like to see that first one. Maybe it's from the Sydney Bristow collection. Parker asks Mac for her opinion, but Parker's mom seizes on that, saying that she can't make a decision, and that she's too immature for college. I'll take the latter first: there's no such thing. And the former? I think she's decided that you're a nasty, cold harpy. So can Parker stay now? No, apparently as soon as her dad finishes raising holy hell at the Dean's office, they're taking her home.